Tomorrow My Son Starts Concerta…

by Janice

I can still hear my mom telling me as we watched my two year old son playing, “One day they are going to try and tell you to put that child on Ritalin — and don’t you listen.”

concertaI nodded in approval, watching my son and wondering what his future would hold. I knew already he wasn’t “typical” in many ways.

In fact, even in his appearance, he was unlike any child I had met. He towered over children his own age. To this day, we have never met a child his age that shares his height.

Verbally, he also raced ahead of his age group. By two and a half he spoke as clearly as a child twice his age, with insights, worries and insecurities well beyond his years.

His mind and his body were rapidly developing, but emotionally and socially, he was struggling. This discrepancy was compounded by the fact that he appeared to be so much older than he was.

When people gave me disapproving glares at my rambunctious child, I wanted to tape a sign to his chest, “Give me a break — I am TWO!”

Now, six years later, I still want to tape a sign to his chest some days. Perhaps it would read, “Give me a break, you have NO IDEA!”

And really, none of us, myself included, know what it is like to be him. I know he desperately wants to “be good.” Underneath all the chaos and noise, he has a sweet, tender heart. He is a complicated mix of humanity — bright and beautiful, but complex.

He describes it as “having challenges.” Today, at the McDonald’s Play Place, he met a five year old with Sensory Processing Disorder. The two of them roared around and had a wonderful time together. When it was time to leave, they both wanted to exchange phone numbers.

When we got in the car, my son said, “He has challenges like I do. It is so nice to play with other children who know what it is like to have challenges.”

My son knows he is different. He has been getting in trouble for the last seven years. In every single classroom or lesson, he has been a challenge to manage. He knows it. It hurts him even though no one knows how much.

So last year, I did it. We medicated him. I decided we needed to give him the chance to see if it helped him — if it made his life better.

After a year of Strattera, we decided that it was not helping him nearly enough. In fact, I think it made him more emotional and prone to outbursts.

So tomorrow, he begins Concerta (an extended release form of Ritalin to treat ADHD.)

And although I know it is the right decision for my son to at least TRY it, here I am the night before Googling side effects, worrying and wishing I didn’t have to hand my child a pill in the morning — wishing that life for him just wasn’t so “challenging.”

PS:I have struggled for years about whether to write about my son’s ADHD and behavioral issues. But ultimately, I want to be his advocate, not just personally, but to help us all have more understanding and compassion on children with behavioral issues. I am not trying to say whether or not a family should choose to medicate their child. I just wanted to share our story and a small glimpse of how we came to try ADHD medication and how I feel about that decision.

Written by Janice, co-founder of 5 Minutes for Mom.



Email Author    |    Website About Janice

Janice is co-founder of 5 Minutes For Mom. She's been working online since 2003 and is thankful her days are full of social media, writing and photography. You can see more of her photos at janicecrozephotography.com.

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{ 53 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Donna ~Blessed Nest March 18, 2010 at 3:21 am

Thanks for sharing his story! You’re son sounds amazing and you are an amazing Mom.

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2 Christine March 18, 2010 at 3:43 am

God gives us tools to help us through life’s challenges… Praying you find the perfect ones for Jackson!

{{HUGS}}

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3 Mom24 March 18, 2010 at 6:55 am

I’m so sorry for the struggles. I hope you and Jackson can find the right combinations to help him.

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4 Julie March 18, 2010 at 6:58 am

You sound like such an amazing mom! Our son has a similar issue – although his has seemed to calm itself down as we try conquer his ADHD. It takes a LOT of work…but the results are worth every step!

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5 Rebecca March 18, 2010 at 7:06 am

Wow…this really is an issue that so many people have to deal with, but never know how to do it. It almost seems as if you’re never making the right decision (and so many people are so quick to give you their very conflicting opinions). As a teacher, I have seen many parents struggle with this and my heart goes out to your son. Most of the kids who have trouble in the classroom really want to be a “good kid.” One of the best things you can hope for is a teacher who understands his needs/challenges and doesn’t just dismiss him because he’s hard to manage.

I taught middle school, so at that point, many parents are wondering if their child can cope without the medications…most of the time, they can. Hang in there and thanks for sharing.

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6 Maggie March 18, 2010 at 8:08 am

My son, now 14, was diagnosed ADHD at the age of 4. Not a big surprise. My brother is also ADHD and am I. I took Ritalin from teh age of 3 to the age of 9, so I was nto uncomfortable with the meds. He’s tried everything out there. The versions of Ritalin worked much better for him than Straterra or Adderal. Concerta was great although he did develop a tolerance for it and we’d have to pull him off of it for a few weeks so it woudl be mroe effective. He was on a huge does also. Not he is on Daytrana, the patch and has been for 3 -1/2 years.

You’ve started off look at all of the non-med options and tried them. Sometimes, you need to go to the Meds. My 14 YO is a happy, well adjusted, doing well in school young man. The meds have stunted his growth. But it was worth it.

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7 Heidi March 18, 2010 at 8:22 am

Wow, Janice! Good for you for sharing Jackson’s story with the world! I hope that the Concerta works and that he can feel a difference. He sounds so mature and in tune with what’s going on with his body. Poor kid! He’s blessed to have you for his mommy!

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8 shelly March 18, 2010 at 8:50 am

I can really relate to your struggle. I have struggled with the decision to put my son on meds and I’m still struggling with it. It’s not an easy thing to give your child something that you aren’t sure about and has the potential for so many different side effects. I hope that you find something that works for him!

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9 Tracey March 18, 2010 at 8:55 am

I admire the fact that you are willing to do what you feel is best for your child. Thank you for giving us a glimpse of the world through his eyes.

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10 Jennifer, Snapshot March 18, 2010 at 9:02 am

Janice–

Thanks for writing about this. It’s definitely something that will be an option for Kyle, I think. Obviously, we want to see how it goes (he’s only 5), but I can see it could be an option, and I’m certainly not ruling it out.

My sister’s 4 1/2 year old told her, “Sometimes my head is buzzing so much, I can’t think.” Sounds like it runs in the family, right?

I wish you and Jackson the best, and I hope it helps.

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11 Jen March 18, 2010 at 9:40 am

It’s such a hard decision to make. My brother, who is now 25, was diagnosed with ADHD (with a really big H) when he was in early elementary school. My parents also struggled with the decision of medication but decided to try it. I have to say it was a lifesaver in more ways then one. He was finally able to concentrate on school work AND concentrate on the things that went on at home- homework, meal time, interactions with others, etc. When he was in high school they decided to do a no-med trial– it was disastrous. Even my brother recognized that he couldn’t focus on schoolwork or even on his hobbies. My brother never took a “vacation” from the medication and he is a healthy, TALL young man- who is still on a low dose of medication.

I think choosing medication HAS to be a personal, family choice and it has to be monitored closely by the family and the doctors. My brother tried different kinds until a successful one was found- and as he got older and new stuff would come out, some of that was tried. There are lots of people against medication- thinking parents are only looking for a quick fix and a way to make their child perfect– but you know that is not the case- you are trying it because he has difficulties that are not typical.

Good luck and I hope things go well for your family!

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12 Adventures In Babywearing March 18, 2010 at 10:08 am

Hugs to you. Hope all is well.

Steph

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13 Pamk March 18, 2010 at 10:53 am

I have had two boys with challanges. Both my son’s have add and the younger one has adhd. Very different forms of the same diagnosis.Older son was way more distracted than younger but younger was overly hyper. Both were medicated. Like i tell them this pill is not a cure all that it is a tool to help them overcome some of their challanges. It helps but doesn’t do all the work for them. My oldest is 20 and is in college to be an electrician and youngest will start high school next year and both are above average iq. YS has decided that his grades need to be higher to get a scholorship to college so he’s voluntarily working on it.

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14 Mads Mom March 18, 2010 at 11:59 am

Our generation and our children need more mom’s like you. Thank you for sharing your story. I too had a friend as a child that was diagnosed w/ ADHD who also tried Ritalin. He said he didn’t feel like himself. They did their best with behavior modification.
He’s a happy, successful and proud papa today.

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15 Forgetfulone March 18, 2010 at 12:04 pm

There should be no shame in choosing to medicate a child who needs it so that the child will find success in all aspects of his life: social, emotional, academic. Some children NEED it. It makes such a difference. It didn’t make much difference for my son, but for my step-son and my nephew, both who are now adult age, it made all the difference. My 29 year old step-son still takes adderoll so he can function in his job. It means the difference between life and death for his ER patients. So, there IS no shame in needing just as there is no shame in people with any other chemical imbalance. It can make all the difference!

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16 Nikowa Lee March 18, 2010 at 12:22 pm

I’m very glad you shared this very personal part of your life!

My son was diagnosed @ 5 (he’s now 10). He was on Concerta 54mg until the side effects just became too much FOR US. No judgement here. He started to not be able to sleep at night, eyes sinking, counting ribs b/c it limits appetite. But what really caused a problem was constipation. Even with medicine (Miralax) it didn’t improve. Now these side effects aren’t the same for everyone. :)

Blessings

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17 Angie March 18, 2010 at 1:15 pm

My heart goes out to you – I know the struggle of whether or not to put your child on medication. I wanted to share our story with you. Kristofer is my 13 year old son – a personality like no other and we love him to pieces :) In Kindergarten he was so hard to manage – his grades were very poor. We put him on concerta at that age and his grades went to A’s. He has been on concerta until he was 11 I believe. We had been praying about what to do – it seems his personality was changing – he also has Tourettes so he was on medication for that as well. He is now off all his medication and his grades are still A’s and he is in an advanced math class. It seems he outgrew many of his issues. His Tourette’s is still there but it is mild so we leave it alone.

YOU know your child and YOU have to decide how to manage and what to do to help your child. God will help you along the way and He loves our children way more than we can ever imagine. How cool is that?

I pray that your son does well on Concerta. Our son did well on it for many years.

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18 Susie's Homemade March 18, 2010 at 1:46 pm

Thank you for sharing this!! I truly believe there are no bad kids. There are just challenges that need different tools.

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19 Nanette ~ AMomBlog March 18, 2010 at 1:48 pm

We all struggle and have to make the decisions we are most comfortable with. I fought tooth and nail to not put our son on medications including Straterra and two others a specialist wanted him on. I couldn’t put pills into him that could damage his body but could help his mind. We took another route and are trying supplements and he’s showing improvement. That is what I would personally recommend first but like I said. We all have to make the decisions we are most comfortable with and be prepared to take responsibility for those decisions if it turns out to be one that does more damage than good. I hope you find the right thing for your son and he is well, happy and healthy always.

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20 Monica March 18, 2010 at 2:06 pm

My daughter was on Concerta for about 2 years. She is ADD. Her major side effects were loss of appetite and being more emotional. I found that her side effects lessed while she was consistently taking the med. We did not medicate her during school breaks and long weekends. It (the drug) did wonders for her at school. My daughter is now 14 and she can make jokes in the safe surrounding of our immediate family about her condition and taking medicine. She deals with it very well. Be encouraged that you are your childs best advocate and are making the decision that you think is right for your child.

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21 Allison March 18, 2010 at 2:17 pm

I’ve known moms who have struggled with the same thing with their kids. I’ve seen the stress, the fears and seen it takes it toll on both the parents and the kids. It sounds like you have tried everything, and are making the best decision for your son. What a great mom you are!

I hope that Concerta works for your son. Please keep us posted.

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22 Amy from Occupation: Mommy March 18, 2010 at 2:45 pm

It is so hard to know the right thing to do with our kids. I firmly believe that parents know their children the best and usually know what to do. I hope this new medication is a help to your son! It must be heartbreaking to see him struggling.

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23 Amy March 18, 2010 at 3:16 pm

My brother took Ritalin. It took him from a boy quite like you describe, who couldn’t sit still long enough to take a breath and got in trouble CONSTANTLY to a good student with the help of medication (and Sylvan Learning Center to help him catch up on what he’d missed along the way).

Now, at 30, he’s an English teacher (to special needs kids in an inner city school, even) with a masters’ degree. He’s an athlete (he has competed in several half-marathons, for fun) and he rides his bike everywhere, hikes avidly with his dog, camps, is a passionate vegetarian and environmentalist, is my daughters’ favorite uncle, and is all around a terrific guy.

Yes, sometimes these meds are overprescribed, and sometimes they’re used as a crutch for bad parenting, and sometimes doctors don’t do their due diligence before they prescribe them, and sometimes lazy teachers recommend them rather than addressing their own classroom management problems – - – but sometimes they’re REALLY needed, and when they are, they’re a freaking miracle.

I hope that you won’t let ANYONE (not even your mom) tell you that you’re making the wrong decision in medicating your son. You wouldn’t hesitate to give him insulin if he were diabetic. How is this different?

Have peace with your decision and know that we’re lucky to live in a time when these issues can be addressed. And know that if you don’t get good results with Concerta, you’re (obviously) the kind of mom who is going to keep trying until you have exhausted every possibility. You know him best. You know what he needs. Trust yourself to make the best decision possible for him, and tell everyone who says “nay” to stuff it.

(By the way – try to make taking the pill a matter-of-fact occasion. NEVER say, “Have you taken your pill?” when he’s acting up, or he’ll start to resent it. My brother HATED it when people said that to him. I remember him saying, “You only love me when I’m on drugs!” once. We learned from that. He’s still going to get in trouble, even with the pill, because he’s a kid and that’s how he learns. Do your best to make it no different from taking a daily vitamin. In fact, mixing it in with taking a vitamin and whatever other drug store products you use daily – like sun screen? or when he brushes his teeth? – may make it easier for him to both remember accept.)

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24 Amy March 18, 2010 at 3:16 pm

My 13 year old daughter has been on Concerta for a few months now, she was previously on Vivanse, and it made her too emotional. She is not ADHD, but ADD, and so far she has not had any side effects.

Good luck to you!

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25 Crystal March 18, 2010 at 3:16 pm

Thank you for sharing this Janice.

My son has had to face a ton of health problems (he had a heart transplant at 22 days old). Because of this or maybe even in addition to, he is very much a sensory kid. It’s beginning to manifest in extreme outburts of rage and uncontrollable emotions. He’s only 2 but I’m trying to figure out ways to help him. It’s very reassuring to hear of other parents struggling with the same sort of thing. I learn from your experiences and choices. So thank you again for sharing. It really does help.

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26 KK March 18, 2010 at 3:39 pm

It’s nice to know I am not alone on this road. We’ve been traveling it for 5 years now. We’ve tried Ritalin, Adderal, Adderal XR, Concerta, Strattera, Zoloft, Tenex, Focalin, & Focalin XR. Unfortunately, we’re still looking for the right mix to help our son have a chance of success. I wish you much luck in your journey. It’s a difficult choice to find peace with but I have to trust in my heart that we are doing the best that we can in the moment.

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27 Molly March 18, 2010 at 3:48 pm

Your issue seems to be so common for moms these days, but we all just want to do the right thing for our children. I think as mother’s we know what we need to do but it’s often not what we want to do nonetheless. Your son’s story reminds me very much of my stepson, who after being misdiagnosed and trying a few different medications including Ritalin, was finally diagnosed with Asbergers Syndrome. Once they made an accurate diagnosis, it was so much easier to understand his needs, we realized that the drugs were not necessary. Maybe such a thing will happen for you as well. Our son is now in his third year at University of Toronto and he’s doing exceptionally well. I am sure yours will do just as well with the guidance of his mother.

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28 Tarasview March 18, 2010 at 4:56 pm

oh Janice- big huge hugs to you. My son has recently started to be able to verbalize his issues- he told his brother yesterday “I do that because of my AUTISM so there!”. I also just got his Occupational therapist report back and to know the sheer amount our children have to deal with daily astounds me. Our kids are amazing. Just look at how well they do despite the difficulties they have. I’m not sure I would do as well if I had all that to do deal with every day.

Praying for you both. Hope the concerta works. :)

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29 Kristi {at} Live and Love...Out Loud March 18, 2010 at 6:01 pm

Thank you so much for this blog post. I too have a son with ADHD and he is on Concerta as well. He will be 15 years old a little over a week from now and has been using Concerta since he was in the first grade. All of the symptoms you described your son having sound so familiar to me. The only difference is, my son has aways and continues to have difficulty verbally expressing his thoughts and emotions. He is a smart young man, retains information like nobody’s business, but the internal information overload is written all over his face at times. I’m sure that I’m the only one who notices it, but it hurts me that this is something he struggles with.
He is working very hard at learning to focus and be less impulsive as it’s a goal of his to eventually wean off of the medication. I’m not sure if he’ll ever get there, but I’ll never stop helping him try. In the meantime, I am his number one advocate and head cheerleader!
One thing I wanted to mention is that having travelled down this road for many years, I’ve received a lot of criticism from family and friends (which is why I’ve been so hesitant to evenblog about it). Everyone has their own opinion about what your child needs, etc. Follow your instinct. You know your child better than anyone else. Sometimes we’re required to make difficult choices in order to equip our child with everything they need in order to be successful in life. I’ve cried many tears over the grip ADHD has on my son, but wouldn’t change a thing. It’s a part of his life and therefor a part of mine. Good luck!

Kristi, Live and Love…Out Loud
@TweetingMama

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30 punkinmama March 18, 2010 at 6:42 pm

Good post, mom! I think you’ve made a great decision to see what can help your child! Don’t let anyone make you feel any differently!

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31 Alicia March 18, 2010 at 7:04 pm

Thank you for sharing your story with us. I know it’s hard to share personal stories about our children.

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32 Holly March 18, 2010 at 8:08 pm

Hi, Janice. I just read your story and wish the best for you and your family. Just thought I would make an alternative suggestion. Have you ever thought about or tried chiropractic for your child? My husband has had several child/teen patients with some of the same issues, and it has really helped a lot of them. You can get more information at our website, or you can go to http://www.icpa4kids.com and find some more information on kids and chiropractic. If you have any questions, need to find a good doc in your area, or would like more info, feel free to e-mail me. Good luck!

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33 Christina March 18, 2010 at 8:35 pm

I have 7 kids, only 2 have ADHD. My son who is 12 does well on Focalin, which we discovered after several attempts at other meds. My other son takes straight Ritalin. He tried most of the extended release pills and still does best on Ritalin. Both are excellent students and do great on medication. Off of it they are so high strung that the 12 year old can’t even read unless he has his Focallin. Keep up trying to find a fit. It takes a lot of persistance but in the end pays off. It is hard to be a kid like this. My kids have inherited it from me. I don’t use med’s, but I know what their world is like and it’s not easy.

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34 Muthering Heights March 18, 2010 at 9:21 pm

That couldn’t have been an easy decision…I’ll pray that it works well for him! You’re a great mom for working to find a solution to help your child!

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35 Kelly March 18, 2010 at 9:28 pm

I’m so glad you’re sharing your story, Janice. I haven’t walked in your shoes, but I’m sure it must feel scary to make yourself so vulnerable. I pray that God will take your offering and bless it. And that the Concerta is a benefit to Jackson.

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36 Marie March 18, 2010 at 10:02 pm

I read your story and I have lived your life! My son is 19 and 6’8 and 285lbs. He weighed 34lbs at 11 months old. He grew fast and furious. He was smart and had conversations that were deeper then I could ever understand (I felt so stupid sometimes, at 8 I know he was smarter then me). Socially he never fit in and emotionally he still has to battle to get through things. We took him out of public school and put him in private school in 5th grade because the bullying was so bad (even though he was so big he wouldn’t hurt a fly)! The private school was fantastic but only went through 8th grade and he came back to our small school for high school. He did good but I know he still was battling socially and emotionally. We did counselling and I begged the school and doctors to test him for ADHD, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder everything and they said he was too smart and was just awkward and would eventually grow up. He is in college now and I will say I honestly believe he is the maturity of a 15/16 year old in some ways. He is brilliant in the brain and the size of a beast and has the heart of a gentle giant. I cried, prayed, cried some more and wished for a content life for him. I just don’t want him to have to fight the demons that I just feel he must have in that brillant head. Please feel free to email anytime…… I have been in your shoes and I will carry my son a little tighter in my heart everyday because I know he battles different battles then my other 3 children.
Hearts and Hugs,
Marie

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37 Loretta March 18, 2010 at 10:08 pm

It’s always worth trying something to improve your child’s overall lifestyle, whether its changing schools, a medication, or something else.

Reading your post about growing so fast both physically and emotionally I saw a little bit of my oldest son in your words. He’s always been very emotionally advanced, understood concepts well beyond his years, and at one point he event spent a week and a half in a mental hospital because he was having suicidal thoughts at the age of 8 years old.

They wanted to practically sedate him with medication and we said no when we saw what the medications did to him. We sought further opinions and made it through that time without medication.

Dylan is going to be 13 next month and he has finally balanced out! Those years between 8 and 12 were difficult for him, he went through a fairly early puberty and emotional changes that none of his friends could even fathom at their age.

I know that your decision was not made lightly at all. It’s hard to decide what to do for these little people in our lives, it’s as much of a struggle for us as it for them. I hope the medication helps your son to feel that balance that he needs and give him some internal peace.

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38 Tom Guarriello March 18, 2010 at 10:14 pm

This is such a poignant post, Janice. I was trained as a clinical psychologist and even though I haven’t practiced in that field for over 25 years (hey, I’m an old guy!) I still remember vividly the families of many ADHD kids struggling with the same issue you describe here. I’m very reluctant to give advice in situations like yours. But here’s one small recommendation: never judge your son’s reactions to medication or any other form of treatment by anyone’s standards other than his own. Each child reacts uniquely to any therapy and I hope your boy will find this new medication helps him better manage his “challenges.” It’s very courageous of you to share these thoughts with other families struggling with similar circumstances. All the best. Tom

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39 Sarah Mines March 18, 2010 at 11:46 pm

Thank you so much for sharing!

I cant begin to understand how you feel but I can tell you that I have gone through that same thing with my 9yo daughter. I hear your stories and say “hey! i know that situation.” My daughter struggled for the first 5 years of her life. Being a therapist, I knew something was wrong but no one would help me. She failed kindergarten…struggled horrible in 1st grade until we got help. Sh had lots of friends but made terrible grades. Everyday was a challenge. Homework could last hours and she fell far far behind in reading. Until…….CONCERTA!!! Even though it is a med and even though I cant make up for the lost education, things ARE better. She is getting good grades and conduct report in school, homework is easier, life is better for her. Stay strong~

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40 LaVonne March 19, 2010 at 11:02 am

Janice, I got a little teary eyed reading this. You made it possible to be in your shoes for a moment. And you realize things are black and white. Decisions can be very difficult. I am thinking of you this morning here in N. California and I hope this new medication works out for your son and family.

Blessings!
LaVonne

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41 Steph March 19, 2010 at 11:37 am

Thank you for sharing this. I have been debating writing about my son’s challenges with ADHD as well. I think you actually gave me the courage to write about it. If it can help someone else’s child… Thankfully there is help out there for kids like ours, it’s just difficult for us as moms to reach out for that help and see our kids forever labeled as different. ((((HUGS))))

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42 Deb - Mom of 3 Girls March 19, 2010 at 7:46 pm

We realized when Abby started preschool that she was different from the other kids too. Five years later and she’s still different in so many ways that just can’t be quantified. She’s absolutely, wholely, uniquely herself – and that’s what every teacher and psychologist has told us as well. She’s Abby, and she’s happy that way – most of the time. She does struggle at school, mainly with organization and focus, and she doesn’t have many friends. She’s been diagnosed with Asperger’s, ADHD and generalized anxiety and we’ve been going the medication route for her as well, hoping that once we find the right solution that will help her to be able to focus and pay attention, that will help her to be able to work on the other issues. We tried Strattera, but it was horrible – kept her up at night and caused much anxiety that took months to work through. She was on Adderall until the first of the year when changes in our insurance caused us to not be able to afford it anymore. Since then she’s been on a very low dose of generic ritalin, but I don’t think it’s doing much to help. We’ll be re-assessing in the next couple of weeks both at conferences with her teacher and with her pediatrician. It’s so hard to know that she is smart and knows the material, but still can’t focus well enough to do a good job on homework or tests.

I struggle with how much to blog about Abby’s issues too – it’s so hard to know how much to share online. I applaud you for choosing to advocate for Jackson and other kids like him and sharing his story with all of us! And good luck with the Concerta – I hope that it helps!!

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43 Teresa March 19, 2010 at 10:59 pm

Bless you and your son and all of the “challenges” of parenthood. Trust your heart and your instincts. Motherhood is often a one day at a time (sometimes one moment at a time) learning process!

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44 Steph March 21, 2010 at 1:31 pm

I just wanted to check in and see how the Concerta is working? I also wanted to thank you for giving me the courage to write about my son’s ADHD. I hope our stories will help another family struggling with this diagnosis.

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45 Angie March 21, 2010 at 11:22 pm

Janice,

Reading this post brought tears to my eyes. My daughter, who will turn 11 this Tuesday, began getting into trouble when she was YOUNG – day care young. In kindergarten, she was sent to the office 7 times. In first grade, I made the decision to medicate her. We’ve tried Adderall, Adderall XR, Vyvanse, and Strattera, and the only ones that help well are Adderall and Adderall XR. While it was hard to put my child on medication, I see the difference when it comes to homework time and I hear about the difference when it comes to the teachers. I just hope that she’ll grow out of this, but I’ve heard both – they do and they don’t.

Every day is a struggle and a learning process. I look forward to learning more from you!

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46 Sandy (Your Life, Organized) March 22, 2010 at 11:51 pm

I understand how you are feeling. My daughter was always labeled the bad child….. when it was just hard for her to sit still and listen. She wasn’t being bad she just wasn’t being the way everyone thought she should be. We have now been on meds for a year and it is amazing how much better she does, it is crazy when a teacher will tell you they didn’t know your child could read before the meds! I am all for the meds as long as they are helping her in a positive way.
I hope things go well for your little guy! hugs to you!

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47 Alycia March 25, 2010 at 3:24 pm

Janice,

Thank you so much for sharing your story. Putting your child on medication is one of the hardest decisions a parent can make. A child’s ADHD behavior is not life threatening so many people will judge the choice. Some people think it is an “easy out” to control a willful child but really it is a choice to try and give your child a shot at a normal life. It allows them to learn, not only in the classroom, but also in life by allowing them to listen to peers and participate in social situations more effectively. Parents who make this decision do not do it lightly. Medication has helped our son immensely. It is still not perfect. His ADHD and impulsivity makes friendships in school extremely difficult but he is at least able to go to a regular school and get an education.

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48 julie March 27, 2010 at 11:03 pm

OMGOODNESS that sounds just like my son-even the “tallness” aspect.Zach is such an inquisitive little boy,so curious,loveable,funny–but just sooo INTENSE.We have just finished up the “testing” aspect of it and go in a few weeks to see if he officially has add/adhd or something else.I always said I would NEVER medicate my child and here we are at the possiblity of it.I hate it.I absolutely HATE IT.We are homeschooled so that’s not much of a challenge.It’s just that we want him to be able to go to “sunday school” and have other activities like maybe karate,but if he can’t be still and pay attention,what would he learn? you know……I’m really torn about the medication aspect of it.I really am.

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49 Lorie Shewbridge March 28, 2010 at 9:27 pm

I’m so glad that you had the courage to discuss this with us all. It can be very difficult to put it out there for fear of being criticized. You are a wonderful mom and I know that you have done your research and you have the best interest of Jackson at heart. Things will work out for the best if you keep talking to him and your doctor.

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50 Damselfly March 30, 2010 at 12:49 am

Thank you for sharing this. I hope your family will find the right treatment for your son. How is Concerta going so far?

My son was recently diagnosed with sensory processing disorder. It’s a new and bewildering idea to me, and part of me isn’t sure it’s a real condition or just a high-energy child who will grow into himself, so to speak, as he gets older. But we are trying to help him the best that we can and taking things one step at a time.

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51 amanda May 20, 2010 at 10:32 pm

these are my exact feelings tonight, for tomorrow. the googling brought me to this. thank you so much for sharing.

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52 Natalie November 21, 2012 at 11:22 am

We, too, are so torn. We can’t help but feel there is something we’re not doing, or should be doing better/differently that would guide our son to not having so many “challenges”

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53 maria April 9, 2013 at 11:43 pm

hi, have a question and pretty much undecide on what to do… my daughter is 8 yrs old and ever since she started school she has been getting in trouble.. but now that she is in 2nd grade her grades have drop and has been getting in trouble more than usual everyday i she gets a connduc mark and im worry because the teachers tell me that she dosent concentrate on her work in the classroom.. i was thinking about putting her on medication but my husband dosent think we should.. help i dont knw what to do to help my daughter.. :(

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