Tomorrow, I Will Try Not to Scream…

by Janice

sleeping-liv

It was a cranky day. The kind that starts late Sunday night and lasts until bedtime Monday.

She didn’t want to wake up, she didn’t want to get up.

She fussed at dinner, she fussed at the park.

And now at bedtime, she does not want to go to sleep.

After three stories, one was extra long, she begins her protest — the kind that over-tired children do. She flails and flops around her bed. She throws her covers and her pillow. She insists she isn’t tired. “See, I can’t go to sleep!”

Then after about fifteen minutes, she crawls over to me, as I rest quietly on one side of the bed reading on my phone.

She puts her head on my shoulder and says, “I love you, mom.”

“I love you too. Do you want to say your prayers?”

“Dear Lord, thank you for this day and please make Nana feel better soon,” she prays.

Then she lies still, her breathing slowing, her damp hair warming on my shoulder.

“I love you, baby,” I whisper in her ear.

“I love you too, mom,” she whispers back.

“I like it when you aren’t screaming.” I say.

“Me too.”

“Let’s not scream tomorrow,” I say.

“I’ll try,” she replies.

“Me too,” I answer.

And then she is asleep.

There is a dog barking in the distance. I can hear it through the open window. But she is quietly breathing and the stress of the day is gone.

Tomorrow, I will try not to scream.

Written by Janice Croze, co-founder of 5 Minutes for Mom



Email Author    |    Website About Janice

Janice is co-founder of 5 Minutes For Mom. She's been working online since 2003 and is thankful her days are full of social media, writing and photography. You can see more of her photos at janicecrozephotography.com.

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{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Dawn June 16, 2014 at 7:37 pm

Oh, Janice, this is a post with which I can absolutely relate. I make this promise to myself more frequently than I wish I had to. We just returned home after being away for eight days, and during that time we stayed with grandparents and friends at different places, and I remarked to the children that I loved NOT yelling for the vast majority of the time. I wish we could stay in vacation mode forever, since that eliminated so many of the regular day-to-day conflicts. Sigh. May we both have a wonderful tomorrow. :)

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2 Janice June 16, 2014 at 11:37 pm

Oh yes – isn’t it so nice to have that break from the regular chaos? Summer break has started here early due to a teacher strike, and although there are still plenty of sibling squabbles, at least we don’t have homework, early mornings, and rushing to school to deal with for awhile. Hope you have a great summer too!
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3 Jill June 16, 2014 at 9:08 pm

Oh, I so know how this feels to be in that exact moment and say those exact things. It’s how I end more days with Kendall than I’d like to admit.
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4 Janice June 16, 2014 at 11:39 pm

Isn’t it strange how badly we humans crave empathy? It isn’t like I want you to suffer too, but it sure makes it easier knowing you understand my pain and struggles. :) HUGS
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5 Nolie
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June 16, 2014 at 10:09 pm

And that is how you know it is a Monday. We had to go out to sit on our front step to escape our screaming 2 year old yelling NO as he was mad we made him go to bed.
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6 Lorraine Wilkie June 17, 2014 at 4:36 am

Beautiful. Touched me, had to tweet it. Hope you don’t mind.

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7 Janice June 19, 2014 at 2:23 am

Thank you so much Lorraine!!! I really appreciate you sharing and for your feedback. :-)
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8 Star Traci June 18, 2014 at 7:37 am

Oh. This one got me. My daughter and I are walking similar challenges. Beautiful if simple words.
Traci
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9 Janice June 19, 2014 at 2:25 am

So glad that this post resonated with you. Parenting sure has its challenging moments but there is so much love and tenderness threaded through it all. Thank you!
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10 anne June 18, 2014 at 9:59 am

This was an emotional and lovely post.

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11 Janice June 19, 2014 at 2:25 am

Thank you so much Anne!
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12 anne stewart June 18, 2014 at 12:10 pm

I love this post! So important to remember!

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13 vickie couturier June 19, 2014 at 11:46 am

I raised a boy and a girl,and I think the hormones with the girl were the worse,,oh he got upset sometimes but didn’t scream and yell like she did,,I think we are too much alike,,,Ive learned to just hang up or walk away from her tamturms,,she still has them as a adult also,,but the difference is I don’t have to listen this time,,,lol

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14 Janice June 19, 2014 at 6:53 pm

Oh yes – each child is so different! My boy is six years older and I am glad that now at 12 he is getting a little easier. My girl has her share of both sweet and sour. ;)
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16 Lara Clinton June 25, 2014 at 6:30 pm

There is so much truth in this article for all moms — where they find patience at the end of days like those is amazing!

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This was really neat to read and just want to thank you for sharing.

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