For the last couple months, I’ve been giving in to the enemy of comfort eating.
It’s not been out of control, but I’ve known I’m eating more than I need… treating myself to unnecessary snacks and taking extra but-it-tastes-good-and-I-deserve-it bites.
Tonight I devoured an indecent amount of Easter chocolate and, hours later, I still haven’t recovered.
I’m notoriously all-or-nothing with chocolate. I can go months without eating any, but let a morsel touch my tongue, and I’m a goner.
I was so proud of myself this past Halloween when I vowed to not eat a single Halloween chocolate and I made it through.
And with Easter coming, I was going to make another no-chocolate-pact with myself again. But unexpectedly, I received a box of especially fine chocolate and I couldn’t refuse.
When I was alone, I made a cup of coffee, turned on the TV and opened the box. I knew I was going to do it. I ate one. It was beyond good. I ate another. And another.
I didn’t want to stop because I wanted to eat so many that I felt sick. So I could get through the next few months hating chocolate… remembering how sick I felt from binging on it.
I ate almost all of it. It’s been 5 hours and I still feel sick. It may seem bizarre that I’m actually pleased I feel sick… but I’ve been giving in to comfort eating for weeks and I’ve gained at least five pounds and am beating myself up with guilt.
I gave myself the excuse that I needed to hit the bottom of my decline and tomorrow I’d put on my walking shoes and start getting back in shape.
You see I love to walk. I love to exercise. I love to feel in shape and good about how I look.
But I’m a busy work-at-home mom, struggling to squeeze enough productive time out of my day. And what always goes first is my exercise time.
Janice wrote a couple weeks ago about how we fight about me taking the time to walk. Well, over the last couple months, I’ve lost that fight and let my exercise-time fall off the bottom of my priority list. And the result has been disastrous.
When I don’t exercise, everything falls apart. I feel sluggish and lack energy. I feel fat and beat myself up and lose my self esteem. And then I eat a little more than I need.
So tomorrow, I will walk. I’ll put on my favorite pair of walking shoes and go for a POWER walk. I WILL get back to exercising. Because I don’t care how much work I have to do, I have to take care of ME. We all have to take serious care of ourselves. We’re mothers and we give of ourselves endlessly. But we must take care.
Please join me and decide to take better care of yourself. Even if that just means going for a walk.
Funny thing is we are actually working with Weight Watchers right now for their Walk It Challenge, but this post isn’t really about that. This post is about me… with a stomachache and a plan to get back on track.
But the timing happens to be perfect. Check out Janice’s post yesterday about the Weight Watchers Walk It Challenge.
Tell me, do you ever comfort eat? Do you give yourself time to exercise?
Bottom Photo Credit: Skechers.