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4 Year Old Coleman Has Gone To Heaven

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I’m reading Coleman Scott Larson’s carepages update and I’m choking on a lump in my throat as tears well up…

You might be one of the thousands who have been following Coleman’s journey on carepages.com, or you might remember Coleman from our Blogs Can Change Lives campaign, or this might be the first time you’ve seen his photo… regardless of how long each of us have known Coleman, he has a message for us:

“Coleman would NOT want you to be mad at God.”

I do not know how Coleman’s mother can write with such courage… it must be God’s strength within her.

Here are some excerpts from her recent post called “Tears filled with Hope”.

“Coleman said long ago, “Some day I won’t need NO more meds or pokes, wight mommy?”

No more sweetie. You are free.

Coleman

Today the world may have cried a river of tears for a little boy’s life that ended way too soon, but we believe Heaven is REJOICING over Coleman’s job well done.

Coleman was an amazing child of God and we were so honored to be chosen as his parents.

He left this world at 10:45 last night- he fought HARD until the very end, not wanting to give up, but finally letting go. He was a warrior and a hero our hearts will forever miss. We had the most glorious five years together- a gift we will never forget.”

Coleman’s mother tells this profound story… you MUST read this…

Coleman“One day Coleman heard someone say they were mad at God. He didn’t say a word, but later came to me with this complete look of disbelief on his face and asked, “mommy? did you hear them say they were mad at DOD? WHY would they say that?” He couldn’t even fathom the thought. Then he raised his little eyebrows and said, “well, I hope they don’t say that in PUB-WIC (public)!” and walked away. He knew there were some things he could not change, but HIS faith never wavered.

Lots of people have mentioned their anger toward God …how can He let this happen when so many people have been praying for Coleman? Why didn’t he answer our prayers?

I just can’t be angry at Our God who sent Coleman to us in the first place. Coleman was a child of God, WE were chosen to be his parents- and how blessed we were. Maybe my feelings will change, but like Coleman, I can’t imagine being angry at God. Would we have loved to have had more time with Coleman? YES! I want him back right now, but I know that’s the selfish part of me talking. I know I will hurt more than I can ever imagine in missing him… and I know I will have MANY days of heartache and anger, but my anger is over the fact we live in a world where we can do so much, but still do not have a cure for this horrific disease. Children are paying the price for that. More on that will come-

I guess what I’m saying is I know for a fact, Coleman would NOT want us to be mad at God. He taught us so much in his time here. His lessons will go on for a very long time. He knew where he came from and he knew where he was going. My heart aches for more time, but I’m SO thankful for the time we got with him, and we know we WILL be with him again. God doesn’t always answer our prayers in the way we want him to…HIS ways are not ours, and that’s hard to accept, but true. It doesn’t mean I don’t question it- it’s hard to understand, but one day we WILL know.

Many people have asked how Caden is doing. Now that’s a long story, but we have assured him that we love him. He is dealing the best way he can- just like us.

I turned my desk Praying Parent calendar today, and thought I’d share what it said…
“We are dependent on God to enable us to raise our child properly, and He will see to it that our child’s life is blessed.” One thing I have learned is that I should not try to force my own will on my child in prayer. I have found it is better to pray more along the lines of “Lord show me how to pray for this child. Help me to raise him Your way, and may Your will be done in his life.”

I believe God’s will was done through Coleman. I know it.”

The family is asking that instead of flowers, please send donations in Coleman’s memory to either:

The Hospice House of Fort Dodge, Iowa
The Ronald McDonald House of Iowa City
or curesearch.org

Reader Interactions


25 Comments

  1. i’ve been surfing on the net related to my life story.. then i found this heartbreaking story of yours.. i know the feeling because i had a 4year old son who left us and went back to our CREATOR more than two years ago… GOD how i miss my son everyday of my life. His name is Gabrielle.. Like Coleman, he love GOD so much. He had taught us so many things in life.. and touched everyone’s lives. I have lots of things to share about my son… a story that i hope could give everyone an inspiration, encouragement and hope to life… GOD LOVES US SO MUCH… LET US KEEP OUR FAITH STRONGER EACH DAY WHERE WE COULD ONLY GET OUR STRENGTH TO MOVE ON ALONG OUR JOURNEY IN LIFE… IN GOD’S TIME WE WILL ALL BE TOGETHER AGAIN WHERE THERE IS NO MORE PAIN, NO MORE TEARS, NO MORE HARDSHIPS, NO MORE HEARTACHES ONLY HAPPINESS AND ETERNAL LIFE IN HIS KINGDOM… GOD BLESS US ALL…

  2. Coleman was a great example of Child-like Faith. What a treasue, what a gift he was. To be the parents of such a child, what a honor.

  6. I read Peggy’s update last night, and the tears just started flowing, and they didn’t stop for a good 20-25 minutes, I was just bawling. It was really tough to get myself to stop crying. I will DEFINITELY miss him terribly. The tears are about to fall, again, reading your entry. I wish that C-Man was back here with us. Anyways, I just had to comment. This is definitely one little boy that I hold dear to my heart.
    Amanda R.
    P.S. Not to be rude or anything, but I just thought that I would let you know that C-Man is 5. I just thought i would inform you. Again, this was not meant to be rude, I was just compelled to tell you.

  7. What an amazing story Coleman was able to share during his short time on earth. May God bless and comfort his family in this difficult time.

  8. God bless this family for raising their children in Him. This child’s testimony will live on and many will be affected. I pray that God’s peace and comfort will surround this family during this very difficult time.

  9. What an amazing story and testimony. If more of us had that kind of child-like faith, the world would be a different place for sure. Thanks for sharing.

  10. We recently lost a loved one to Cancer and one of the things we held dear to was that he was no longer in pain. Our prayers WERE answered, just not with the results we had hoped for, but now George is at rest and peace, just like Coleman.
    During George’s funeral his pastor and friend talked about how George lived his life faster than the rest, and he finished his job on earth a little earlier.
    Coleman has left a legacy and hope for all, what a great witness he was.

  11. Heartbreaking, Susan, but there’s comfort in knowing he no longer has to endure the pokes and meds. Poor, sweet child. His family is in my prayers.

  13. Susan,

    thanks for posting about Coleman. I am one of the people who have been following Coleman’s journey closely and have become “attached” to this family that I’ve never even met. It’s strange to feel so close to someone who you don’t even know, but it’s his mom, and the graceful and detailed way she writes EVERY post – good and bad – that amazes and inspires me. She’s taught me to look at my kids in a whole different way – to realize that you never know what can happen and that the “little things” don’t matter as much as loving your children as hard as you can every day.

    I have twin girls. Their bond is SO strong, I find them sleeping in the same bed and holding hands in the middle of the night (even though I’ve put them to bed separately.) They cry when the other one does, they one who is not in “time out” will sit in “time out” while her sister does her time – just to keep her company. I’ve seen them just watching TV stroking each others faces or backs – just things that brothers and sisters who are NOT twins don’t “typically” do. I can’t take one twin to the store without the other one crying the whole time at the door “where’s my sister” and when she gets back, she hugs her like she’s been gone for months.

    I truly can’t imagine what his twin brother is going through. I think only “twins” can understand that bond, and I feel so badly for him.

    This is an AMAZING family and I’m so lucky to have come across their CarePage, even in the circumstances, as they have truly changed my life.

    Thanks for posting, and thanks for choosing my nomination for the Blogs can change lives. I hope that the PSP gave him some joy for the short time while he was going through his last treatments. I love your website and will continue to spread the word about the great things you all do.

    Regards,

    Rachel

  15. I am just in awe at the words this mother has written. I was in her shoes 6 years ago and I wish I could have been as she is.

    The family will be in my prayers.

  16. I lost my ten year old son in an auto-accident November 5, 2004. It was a very hard thing to go through, but with God’s grace, which IS sufficient, we are still going strong. We were blessed to have him for ten wonderful years and now he is back with his Lord. We miss Eli everyday but take great comfort in knowing he is in heaven and we will see him again someday! Thanks for a great post!! **wipes away the tears**

  18. No, we shouldn’t be mad at God because He didn’t “cause” this or “let” it happen. Sin is what brought illness and diseases into this world. Sin is the reason for all of the terrible things that go on. God sent Jesus to rescue us from that sin. We caused this, not God. We will all die one day because of sin.

  20. How sad. God did grant her the strength to write this. I couldn’t imagine losing a child. My prayers are with Coleman’s family as they grieve the loss of this wonderful boy. Everything happens for a reason. It is all part of God’s plan no matter how difficult or confusing it may be. He doesn’t give us more than we can handle.

  21. I am speechless. I feel sad and so thankful that my children are healthy. I want to go wake them and hold them tight. I feel so heartbroken for Coleman’s parents.
    I am glad that he is free of meds and pokes. I wish his little life wasn’t spent in a hospital.
    Rest in peace sweet angel.

  22. To think and write with such strength and positive attitude in a time normally filled with grief, anger and weakness is truly a gift from God in itself. His story, though cut short, is an amazing one. If everyone would stop and think the way he did the world would be such a better place and I hope they can receive some comfort in knowing how incredibly special he was. He was an inspiration and a precious child of god that was called home. The family will be in our prayers.

    ~Erin
    Twitter: @erinjeany
    ejsmomej[at]gmail[dot]com
    http://ejsmomej.blogspot.com/

  24. I am ever so sorry for your loss. Your post made me cry, and it’s a beautiful tribute to a beautiful little boy.

  25. There are times when our tears are the prayers and the Holy Spirit intercedes for what we cannot even utter.

    May God rest his soul and give strength to his family in their time of grief.