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5 Minutes for Books–Intimate Marriage and Confident Parenting

September 3, 2007 by Jennifer Donovan

This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

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I have been a fan of Jim Burns’ Homeword broadcasts for almost a year now, listening to his interviews and book coverage via my ipod. Many of the books that I have featured in this column are as a result of hearing about them on his show. One of his oft-repeated pieces of advice is to read one marriage book and one parenting book every year to build a better family. I just read one of each, both authored by him–drawing on his years of ministry, but more importantly his thirty years of marriage and over twenty years of parenting three daughters. These books are obviously quite different in content, however both feature Burns’ A.W.E. principle, which involves showering those you love with affection, warmth and encouragement. Both are written in a friendly conversational style, complete with illustrations from Burns’ own life and as well as experiences of others he has known or counseled. Following each chapter are questions to help the reader put the principles to work at home. Those in Confident Parenting ask What’s the Point? helps the reader figure out the Purpose, and then make a Plan. After each chapter in Creating an Intimate Marriage you answer Questions for Me, Questions for Us, and complete some Heart-to-Heart Homeconf-parenting.gifwork.

Confident Parenting is a wonderful book if you want to be the transitional generation of parenting–not only so that you can parent better than yours did, but so that your children will fare better as well. Burns wrote this book in response to the struggles he has observed in the areas of discipline and boundary setting, and challenges the reader to choose the pain of discipline over the pain of regret. That part really hit home with me. The last part of the book invites the reader to make their own family plan by examining their purpose and goals (spiritual, relational, physical, emotional and mental). He sums up his approach in the introduction to this exercise:

This book was designed to help you formulate your own parenting plan. I am not big on giving people a “cookie cutter” approach to parenting. Each family is different and each child within a family is different (page 180).

In Creating an Intimate Marriage (also available in Hardcover) Jim Burns asserts that marriage is hard. Add children, jobs, and ministry into the mix, and it takes work to keep it running smoothly and to avoid giving our spouse what he calls our “emotional scraps.” Two chapteintimate-marriage.jpgrs are devoted to communication, and the information about effective listening and problem solving are worth the price of the book. This is a book that could be used by those whose marriage is already in trouble, taken as preventative advice by those just starting off, or reading it in an effort to improve on areas that have slipped. If you are willing to make a few changes, this book will help you to draw closer to your husband, giving him more of what he might need from you, as well as getting more of what you need in return.

Both books also are available in an audio CD version, recorded by Jim Burns himself. I think that listening would be a great way to go through the book together, discussing it as you go along.

Find out more about both books at Bethany House’s site:

Creating an Intimate Marriage: table of contents, download, streaming audio
Confident Parenting: excerpt, download, streaming audio

The publisher has donated one copy of each book and one copy of each CD that can ship to the U.S. or Canada, for a total of four winners. Please leave a comment if you are interested, indicating the order of any preference you might have (book or CD or marriage or parenting subject).

The winners from our Bible Study giveaway are

Java with the Judges—CPA Mom (42)
Proverbs and Daddy’s Girls—Monkey Giggles (11), Angela (53), Crystal D (23)
Completely His book and study—Bonnie (13)

The winners of Meghan Rose On Stage! —Shauna (31), Mama Zen(19), Lori (20), Andrea (25), JewelsHud(46)

The Other Mother — Mama Zen(34), Angela (83)

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A Softer Side To Crawling
Send Your Preschooler To Siberia

About Jennifer Donovan

Jennifer Donovan has been a part of the 5 Minutes for Mom team since 2007. She writes product reviews, covers events, and manages the 5 Minutes for Books weekly column and website. She lives in Houston and blogs at Snapshot about life with her family.

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82 Comments

  1. Christine says

    September 20, 2007 at 10:25 pm

    I’d love either of these, prefer book over CD. thanks

    Reply
  2. slawebb says

    September 18, 2007 at 8:53 am

    either of these would be great, and I’d take either cd or book

    Reply
  3. wendy fortier says

    September 9, 2007 at 8:00 am

    please enter me

    Reply
  4. MomBlog says

    September 8, 2007 at 2:59 pm

    I would like the book form of the parenting book as my first choice and the CD version as my second choice.
    Thank you!
    These sound like excellent books.

    Reply
  5. Nichelle Nell says

    September 7, 2007 at 9:36 pm

    I would like to win the marriage book.. but would also enjoy the parenting book

    Reply
  6. Callista says

    September 7, 2007 at 6:59 pm

    I’d prefer the book form of the marriage book but I’d take either book!

    Reply
  7. Christy says

    September 7, 2007 at 6:17 pm

    Creating an Initmate marriage would be my choice, I love to read!

    Reply
  8. Mandy B. says

    September 7, 2007 at 1:42 am

    I just celebrated my 3 year wedding anniversary and would love to have the Creating an Intimate Marriage book- book form first, CD form second. Since I don’t have any children yet, it wouldn’t be fair for me to get the parenting book- though I would hang on to it for the future! Thanks for offering this great giveaway!

    Reply
  9. Fruitbearer says

    September 7, 2007 at 12:27 am

    1. Confident Parenting Book
    2. Creating an Intimate Marriage CD
    3. Confident Parenting CD
    4. Creating an Intimate Marriage Book

    Please enter me in your giveaway. Thanks a bunch!

    Reply
  10. Natalie says

    September 6, 2007 at 8:05 pm

    I’d prefer the book, but I take long drives so the cd would be nice too. Parenting first, marriage second. 🙂 Thanks!

    Reply
  11. Ashley says

    September 6, 2007 at 1:43 pm

    id love the book of either one. thanks

    Reply
  12. Brittany says

    September 6, 2007 at 9:37 am

    A girl could always use a little help to make her family better. I would choose
    1. parenting book
    2. marriage book
    3. parenting CD
    4. marriage CD
    Great giveaway!

    Reply
  13. musicmomto4 says

    September 6, 2007 at 1:15 am

    I would love a copy of the Book on Intimate Marriage since my husband and I have been struggling with this for years!!! Thanks!

    Reply
  14. A.D. Arumae says

    September 5, 2007 at 3:15 pm

    I love to read.

    Reply
  15. Eric Arumae says

    September 5, 2007 at 3:15 pm

    These books will be wonderful addition to before bed reading

    Reply
  16. Jen says

    September 5, 2007 at 8:49 am

    I would love to have the marriage book on CD!

    Reply
  17. Bonnie says

    September 5, 2007 at 8:14 am

    I would love either one in book form with Confident Parenting being my first choice.

    Thanks

    Reply
  18. Sonia Felker says

    September 5, 2007 at 7:28 am

    We are going to a marriage retreat in Oct. A CD on marriage would be a great way to keep us focused on our relationship.

    Reply
  19. Caryn says

    September 5, 2007 at 2:25 am

    I would love any of them but I think the parenting cd or book would be most helpful right now. Otherwise, marriage cd or book.

    Reply
  20. Myrna says

    September 5, 2007 at 2:24 am

    1. Marriage cd
    2. Marriage book
    3. Parenting CD
    4. Parenting book

    Thanks for hosting.

    Reply
  21. Laura says

    September 4, 2007 at 11:45 pm

    Tons of parenting books around this house…not so many marriage books, though.

    Definitely could use the marriage book (in either book or CD form)!

    Of course, another parenting book couldn’t hurt either.

    Reply
  22. Minnesota Momma says

    September 4, 2007 at 11:44 pm

    No preference, really. They both sound wonderful! I’d probably take a book over a CD though.

    Thanks so much!

    Reply
  23. Jen E says

    September 4, 2007 at 10:29 pm

    They both sound wonderful!!! I’d prefer the CDs but the books are fine also. Keeping my fingers crossed!!!

    Reply
  24. Linsey Knerl says

    September 4, 2007 at 10:16 pm

    They both look so good! But I would really love the marriage book. Thanks so much!

    Reply
  25. Julie Robinson says

    September 4, 2007 at 8:45 pm

    Anything that helps us be better parents or have a better marriage is SO nice. Thanks for the giveaway. My choice would be the marriage first on CD and then the parenting on CD.

    Reply
  26. Sheree says

    September 4, 2007 at 6:39 pm

    Tough choice – I’d probably opt for either the parenting book or cd, then the marriage book or cd. But any of them would be great!

    Reply
  27. Rhonda Toews says

    September 4, 2007 at 4:43 pm

    I would love to win either book (or CD), but if I had to choose, the marriage book. Thanks.

    Reply
  28. Emily S says

    September 4, 2007 at 3:27 pm

    I would be interested in either being a young mom and wife.
    thanks
    Emily 🙂

    Reply
  29. Shera says

    September 4, 2007 at 1:33 pm

    I would love any of these, especially the parenting book. Cd would be great, but book would be fine too!

    Reply
  30. Karla Meachem (Empowering Christian Women) says

    September 4, 2007 at 11:27 am

    Would love the cd on marriage!

    Thanks for the awesome reviews!

    Reply
  31. Jen E says

    September 4, 2007 at 11:12 am

    These sound great!! I’d love either book, preferably the CD but the book would be great too. Crossing my fingers!!!!

    Reply
  32. CPA Mom and Soccer Mom Angela says

    September 4, 2007 at 9:50 am

    I could use both books, honestly so I do not have a preference except I prefer the book to the CD. Thanks ladies!

    Reply
  33. Elizabeth Silence says

    September 4, 2007 at 9:21 am

    Both of these books sound like such a winner. I would love to be entered for either. I would prefer the CD version. I do not see so well and until I get my glasses it is really a strain to read. Of course that doesn’t keep me from reading your blogs. I really like Tackle it Tuesdays.

    Reply
  34. Kim says

    September 4, 2007 at 8:47 am

    Enter me please…

    Reply
  35. Bethany says

    September 4, 2007 at 8:37 am

    I believe I’d enjoy either. My preferences would be:
    1. marriage book
    2. parenting book
    3. marriage cd
    4. parenting cd.

    Thanks!

    Reply
  36. Donna says

    September 4, 2007 at 8:05 am

    I’d love a CD or book copy of either, although I’d pick the CD versions and the marriage book first.

    Reply
  37. Lesha says

    September 4, 2007 at 1:16 am

    I’d love to win Intimate Marriage. Thanks!

    Reply
  38. Faith says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:06 pm

    I’m interested in any of them.

    Reply
  39. Capturing Today says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:03 pm

    I would appreciate any of the 4 options equally well!

    Reply
  40. Laura says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:01 pm

    My preference is
    1. marriage book
    2. parenting book
    3. marriage cd
    4. parenting cd

    Thanks for another great contest!

    Reply
  41. Julie M says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:01 pm

    I would love the book or cd on Marriage but would put any of the 4 to good use!

    Reply
  42. Juliet A says

    September 3, 2007 at 10:33 pm

    I would prefer the marriage book – it sounds as though it could be very useful.

    Reply
  43. melody is slurping life says

    September 3, 2007 at 10:23 pm

    I’m full of parenting books. 🙂 Please enter me in the draw for either version of the “marriage” book. Thanks.

    Reply
  44. Mama Zen says

    September 3, 2007 at 10:12 pm

    They all sound wonderful! I would prefer:
    1. parenting book
    2. marriage book
    3. parenting cd
    4. marriage cd

    Reply
  45. Ruth :) says

    September 3, 2007 at 9:36 pm

    Marriage first – Parenting second – book first – cd second. My husband and I have been blessed to be a part of the great parenting adventure. It seems during that time, we’ve put ourselves aside – and the book on an intimate marriage would be a blessing to read together to use as a tool in our marriage and strengthening our family.

    Reply
  46. Jill says

    September 3, 2007 at 8:40 pm

    I would truly love either book, but am not much of a book on CD person. Thanks for the giveaway!

    Reply
  47. Amy says

    September 3, 2007 at 8:32 pm

    What a wonderful giveaway!
    1. Parenting cd
    2. Marriage cd
    3. Parenting book
    4. Marriage book
    Thanks so much!
    Amy

    Reply
  48. Katrina says

    September 3, 2007 at 7:50 pm

    I’ve been enjoying Homeword as well. Please enter me. I suppose I’d prefer the parenting resources first, but whether book or CD (for either) doesn’t matter. Thanks!

    Reply
  49. Stephanie says

    September 3, 2007 at 3:48 pm

    I enjoy listening to Homeword, on the radio when I can, otherwise online. My favorite recent show featured Gary Thomas (author of Sacred Influence and Sacred Marriage). I would love a chance to win either of Jim Burns’ books in either format. Thank you!

    Reply
  50. Sarah says

    September 3, 2007 at 2:40 pm

    Great giveaway! Here’s my choices…
    1. marriage book
    2. parenting book
    3. marriage cd
    4. parenting cd

    Reply
  51. Krista says

    September 3, 2007 at 2:32 pm

    Hmmm, definitely any would be great although I think I’d prefer the marriage CD then the parenting one and then the same in book form!

    Reply
  52. Jodi says

    September 3, 2007 at 2:25 pm

    I would like to win either, but am leaning towards the marriage one and at the book option.

    Reply
  53. Lisa says

    September 3, 2007 at 2:04 pm

    They both sound wonderful! I’d like either one in either form!

    Reply
  54. Lori - Queen of Dirty Laundry says

    September 3, 2007 at 2:04 pm

    Oh goodness with the choices! Let me see…Marriage CD, Parenting CD, Marriage book, Parenting book.

    I’d really love ANY of them. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

    Reply
  55. Ruth Peyton says

    September 3, 2007 at 2:02 pm

    These both sound fabulous. Whatever is available will be fine – heck, better than fine. Thanks

    Reply
  56. Tiffany says

    September 3, 2007 at 1:49 pm

    Marriage and book!

    Reply
  57. Karen (mommy of three) says

    September 3, 2007 at 1:31 pm

    I would love any of them, thanks!

    Reply
  58. Andrea says

    September 3, 2007 at 12:53 pm

    1. Parenting CD
    2. Parenting Book

    Thanks so much!!

    Reply
  59. Laura Peric says

    September 3, 2007 at 12:46 pm

    I would love to win the parenting book! Sounds really interesting.

    Reply
  60. Amy says

    September 3, 2007 at 12:41 pm

    Please include me in this drawing.

    1. Marriage CD
    2. Marriage Book
    3. Parenting CD
    4. Parenting Book

    Thanks,
    ~Amy

    Reply
  61. Laura says

    September 3, 2007 at 12:19 pm

    Hello! I’d be interested in the marriage book in book format but both books sound great!

    Reply
  62. Laura W says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:44 am

    This would be great! I’d prefer a CD of the marriage book, but anything would be fabulous!

    Reply
  63. Cory says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:20 am

    What a great give-away. You guys are always coming up with very relevant info. Thanks for all you do. I’d love to win the book “Creating an Intimate Marriage”. Although either of the books in either format would be wonderful.

    Reply
  64. Erna says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:19 am

    I would be interested in all of the books but not really the CD. :0)

    Reply
  65. Karen says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:08 am

    Both of these books sound terrific –

    1. Marriage book
    2. Parenting book
    3. Marriage cd
    4. Parenting cd

    Thanks for the opportunity to win!

    Reply
  66. Tessa says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:07 am

    book Marriage, book parenting, then the c.d.s in the same order. I really like books like these. Thanks for the chance.

    Reply
  67. Lynnae (From Under the Clutter) says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:07 am

    Wow, it’s so hard to choose.

    My preference would be:

    Either in book form
    Either in CD form

    Thanks for a great giveaway!

    Reply
  68. Laura says

    September 3, 2007 at 11:01 am

    Marriage- book
    Parenting- book

    Both of these would be great!

    Reply
  69. jenna says

    September 3, 2007 at 10:39 am

    1. parenting book
    2. marriage book
    3. parenting cd
    4. marriage cd

    Great giveaway!

    Reply
  70. Jean says

    September 3, 2007 at 10:11 am

    I would love to win the marriage or parenting book or audio. It’s so hard to choose which first as both would be great.

    Reply
  71. kelli in the mirror says

    September 3, 2007 at 10:09 am

    I’d love either of these titles in book form first, then CD. Thanks!

    Reply
  72. Taowyn says

    September 3, 2007 at 10:08 am

    I would like either of the books (or in cd form). Have a great Labor Day!

    Reply
  73. Mommy Bee says

    September 3, 2007 at 10:01 am

    Great books!

    I would love to have the (1) parenting book, (2) marriage book, (3) parenting cd, or (4) marriage cd.

    Reply
  74. Jen in MS says

    September 3, 2007 at 10:01 am

    I love the idea about reading one parenting and one marriage book each year!

    I’d love a book on parenting (first choice), but I’d certainly enjoy a book on marriage too. Please count me in.

    Reply
  75. Ericka Wagner says

    September 3, 2007 at 8:49 am

    Wow! The comment, “emotional scraps” – yikes. That hit right in the heart!!!
    Thanks for the opportunity to enter for the book!
    Ericka

    Reply
  76. Mikki says

    September 3, 2007 at 8:42 am

    Wow. I would love to have the Marriage book. I am truly blessed with a good marriage, but I myself need a good kick in the pants sometimes when it comes to being able to be who GOD wants me to be in that marriage.

    Thanks so much

    Reply
  77. Lauren says

    September 3, 2007 at 8:37 am

    I would love to win either, but I would probably choose the parenting one first.

    Reply
  78. Heather (Heather's reality show) says

    September 3, 2007 at 8:34 am

    confident parenting please

    Reply
  79. My Quotidian Mysteries says

    September 3, 2007 at 8:25 am

    Oh, looks like we’ve started a theme. I’m eager to read and/or win the Creating an Intimate Marriage book. Right up my alley! I’d be game for either form – book or CD. Thanks!

    Reply
  80. Melissa Markham says

    September 3, 2007 at 6:16 am

    I would like Creating an Intimate Marriage. Book form or CD form would be fine, would prefer book. Sounds like a great book!

    Reply
  81. Bev says

    September 3, 2007 at 2:23 am

    I would like the book form of Creating an Intimate Marriage.

    Reply

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