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Today I’m not going to write about photo techniques, or tips, or gear, or anything like that. Because, in the long run, that’s not what’s most important about your photos. Photography is really about capturing memories of your family, so that you can look back and recall the special relationships, personalities, and activities that were unique to a particular time of your life.
The photos I’m most disappointed by are the ones I never took the time to capture.
I’d like to share with you a story about our family.
Recently we had the privilege of shooting the photography for my brother’s wedding, here in Oregon. Bryant and Hannah are a great-looking and fun-loving couple!
My youngest brother, Landon, traveled up from southern California to serve as “best man” in the wedding. He did an awesome job in that role…
Landon is 19 years old and already in the second year of law school, and has the kind of personality that always makes him a treat to be around. We were able to enjoy some really special times with him over the weekend, doing things together as a family (as he’s the only one who lives outside the area) and just enjoying catching up.
Although, at the time, we took much of it for granted, we no longer do. Because, two days after the wedding, everything changed.
We awoke at 4AM to an emergency telephone call to discover that, as Landon was driving home, he fell asleep at the wheel, struck a tree at 70MPH, and died.
You can only imagine how our family was shattered by this. Words can’t begin to describe.
As we went through the images from the wedding day, processing literally thousands of photos, we were so grateful to have been able to enjoy that final weekend together with Landon and to have documented it so incredibly well through photography.
Although we never would have thought it at the time, some of these images will be the ones we treasure most for the rest of our lives. Here is “Uncle Landon” playing with our 2-year-old at the wedding reception:
I think this is the first time I’ve ever broken down in tears while typing out a blog post… bear with me, please!
The moral of the story is not to drive safely, although that’s certainly something I pay more attention to these days. Sometimes our lives are led into situations like this, and you never know when may be your last opportunity to create memories together.
I wish that none of you will ever have to experience a family tragedy like this. But we don’t know the courses our lives will take, and in the meantime, I encourage you to cherish and enjoy the relationships and family that you have, every single day.
And take lots of pictures.
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Carrie and her husband Jonathan are wedding photographers in Oregon, and you can see more of their writings and recent work on their photo blog.
Heather says
Wow. This is heart-wrenching and beautiful and sad and hopeful all rolled into one post. What fantastic photos to have to remember a man who was clearly remarkable.
Naomi says
I am so sorry to hear about your brother’s passing. What a tragedy, but you’re right about the pictures. It is so clear how loving your family is and what a beautiful wedding it was. I hope they give you and your loved ones some comfort now and in the future.
shaylan says
oh my heart just broke reading that. im so incredibly sorry for your loss. im so glad you guys got that chance to share time with him. whenever i look at pictures of my son with his great-grandfather who passed last september im always so grateful that we had the chance and that there will be pictures to show him someday.
thank you so much for sharing…
Janice says
Carrie – I just can’t even imagine your pain. It is just too horrible.
What comfort your pictures must bring you. What a blessing that you have them!!!
Thank you for sharing this powerful, heartwrenching reminder for us to appreciate each fragile moment – and to reach more often for our cameras!
Mixedblessings89 says
http://greenlemons07.blogspot.com/2009/06/once-upon-time-year-later.html
Thank you.
Lawanda says
Oh my. I am in tears for your loss, too. What a wonderful tribute you have given your loved one.
Andrea McMann says
Oh Carrie, I’m so sorry!! My mother lost her brother at a very young age, in much the same circumstances, but she didn’t have the comfort of wonderful last memories and images of her brother.
I also recently got to see my grandma for the first time in a few years. I was so grateful to have that time with her and get some great pics with her and myself, and also my kids. Then just yesterday she had a stroke. At this point we don’t know if she’s going to recover or not, but I’m so glad to have those photos and memories!
Angie says
Carrie, I am so sorry for you and your family’s loss. What a shame. Losing someone is never easy. Prayers and hugs to you and your family!
melanie says
Carrie I am soooo sorry for your loss! Prayers and thoughts are with you.
I couldn’t agree with you more about taking more photos.
hugs!!
Amanda H says
Carrie, thank you for sharing. So sorry for your loss. Just from the pictures, i can see how beautiful of a person he was. Thank you for the reminder.
Stephanie says
Carrie, thank you for sharing a very personal and vivid reminder of why our pictures are so valuable. Lots of hugs sent your way!
Angela at mommy bytes says
I’m so sorry for your loss, he sounds like an absolutely wonderful person. The photographs are beautiful and will be cherished for a long time.
Mixedblessings89 says
For the past 5 minutes, I’ve been trying to write a coherent comment, but I don’t think that will be possible… my fingers are shaking, and… I was trying to type out what it felt like a year after a similar tragedy haunted my family on my blog when I somehow got sidetracked to your blog… I’m so desperately sorry for your loss, dear, even though I don’t know you… so very sorry.. believe me, it will never be the same… and now I’m crying too… Thank you for sharing your story, it really made me feel like I’m not alone… Thank you, and may Landon rest in peace, love and in your memories forever.
Nina says
Amen, amen, amen! It puts things into such perspective, doesn’t it? My brother died when I was pregnant. I have no pictures of him enjoying his neice. That was in 2001. It still feels so recent. You are so blessed to have these gorgeous, smiling photos, and the memory of a brother who was happy and talented and made you all so proud. Thank you for sharing your story. The photos are lovely.
Susan says
Carrie, I am sooooo desperately sorry for your family’s loss. An accident like that is just such a brutal heartbreak.
But what a great way to look at your last weekend together. How wonderful that you have those photos.
You are so very right. And this is something that I’m so guilty of. I hate being in photos and I often think how selfish that is of me. One day my children will want to see photos of me, and there just aren’t as many as there should be.
And I’m often mad at myself that so many days go by without me taking photos of my girls. I’m so thankful that Janice takes as many photos as she does, since I don’t pick up my camera as often as I should.
Thank you so much for sharing this powerful and meaningful post with us here at 5 Minutes for Mom.
My thoughts and prayers are with your family.
mummyof5monsters says
*hugs* even the bad photos are a captured memory:)
Staci A says
I’m so sorry for your loss. Reading your post brought tears to my eyes. I can’t even imagine.
You are right, we need to cherish every moment and take lots of photos. Thank you for sharing.
angie says
Congratulations to your brother. Your other brother must be very smart to be that far along in school. Great for him. Great pictures and I do know what you mean about the pictures that you did not take it is always disapointing to think about the pictures that got away
MaryBeth says
Carrie,
I am so sorry for your loss and greatful for you that you have the photos and the wonderful memories.
Four years ago I traveled home for a weekend with family and friends for a baby shower… I was expecting my first baby. I spent precious time with my baby brother then thankfully because in the middle of the following Monday night I got the call that he had been killed in a car crash. He was 23.
I love that I at least have the memories that we made but what I wouldn’t give to have just one photograph of him and my great big baby belly!
Hugs to you in the days and weeks to come….
morninglightmama says
Carrie, you have so eloquently honored your brother here and given us all some important reminders about treasuring those we love. I often roll my eyes when my husband asks me to grab the camera again and again, but I do know how important these photos are to us and our memories.
Again, I’m so sorry for your loss.
Amy says
Carrie — Thank you for sharing from your heart that the quality of the photograph is the SUBJECT of the photograph.
So glad for your family that you had that precious weekend together.
My little brother was killed 7 years ago in a car accident. He was 22.
Jesica says
Carrie – thank you for taking the time to share this with us. I’m sure it was the hardest blog you’ve ever written. I’m so sorry for your loss – and will keep you and your family in my prayers.
Amy says
Carrie,
I am so saddened by your loss. It does remind me to take in every moment.
Thank you for sharing this.
ModernMom says
This is my first time to your blog and you have moved me to tears.
I am so so sorry for your loss, There really are no words.
Wishing you and your family strength.
Thanks for sharing your story.
RefreshMom says
I am soooo sorry for your loss! I’m glad you had that precious weekend together and you all have your beautiful photos to remind you of your dear brother and uncle. My prayers to you all.
Mary Hampton
Carrie says
Oh, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. What a blessing to have all those photos. I’m sending up a prayer for your family.
jenni williams says
Carrie,
I am sorry for your loss. Thank you for the reminder.
Jennifer, Snapshot says
Carrie–
You know I’ve been “with you” through all this. Thanks for sharing a side of this that can encourage all of us to make the most of our special moments with families.
Sharon says
Carrie,
I am so very sorry for the loss of your brother Landon. So very sorry for I know the pain you feel right now. My little brother died too – when he was 21, very suddenly.
Little I can write will help at this very moment, now I am crying. I wish you strength, love, peace and eventually joy as you walk through your grief. I am so sorry.
My condolences to you and your family.
Sharon
Gena says
Carrie, I am so sorry! You touched my heart and brought tears to my eyes.
I know, after losing so many family members to cancer, I must cherish every day and “keep a record” of it.
I have always said that, if my home were destroyed by fire or some other disaster, Lord, save our lives and our pictures.
I am a photo taking freak and proud of it!
Maggie says
Oh Carrie, I was moved to tears reading this. Your brother, Landon, was just gorgeous. You can see the twinkle in his eye, even on camera. I know how much you will treasure those photographs!!!!
Much love and prayers to you and your family!
Maggie
Erica says
Carrie – I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Thank you for sharing the story, amidst your tears. You really did nudge me to do more cherishing and of course more picture taking.