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A decade ago, the blogosphere was a very different place than it is now. It was like a small town before the railroad opened it up to the world.
We knew each other by first name – or at least by our blog names. We would stop by each other’s place for a visit each morning, lingering over a cup of tea or coffee, catching up on each other’s news.
It was a slower world. We could only visit with so many friends — we had to actually go to their blogs for goodness sake. We didn’t just scan a Facebook feed and drop emojis and likes.
We shared our stories. We connected with each other. We formed community.
Now the blogosphere is a busy marketplace. We run in and out of stores and businesses. We get what we need, slowing down a step or two to say hi to neighbors and friends before we dart off to our next task.
And if Facebook decides that someone doesn’t matter to us, they disappear from our feeds and we forget that we haven’t seen them for months, maybe even years.
This past week I have been editing wedding photos, trying to get caught up on my work while my kids are out of town. I have kept off Facebook in my attempt to stay focused.
But around 9pm, I glanced at Facebook and saw the shocking news Anissa Mayhew had died this morning.
I was horrified and went over to her FB page to try and find out what had happened. I read through post after post from Anissa’s friends, everyone just gutted to learn that Anissa is no longer with us.
Susan and I have known and loved Anissa since those early blogging days, when Anissa started her first blog, Hope for Peyton, blogging to help cope with and share her daughter’s cancer fight.
After her daughter’s cancer went into remission, Anissa started a new blog, Free Anissa. She also went on to start the wonderful and successful site, Aiming Low.
I interviewed Anissa the summer of 2009 at BlogHer in Chicago. Anissa was cheerful and thrilled about her daughter’s remission and her new blogging adventures…
In late 2009, Anissa suffered a massive stroke. The blogging community rallied around her with force and Anissa came to BlogHer 2010. We had the opportunity to interview Anissa again and find out how she and her family were doing…
Anissa represented what was so incredible about the early blogging community — the raw, intimate, and powerful friendships we bloggers formed as we all grew up together in the brand new blogosphere.
Anissa made everyone she met feel special and powerful — and she kept us all laughing with her very unique sense of humor.
With her passion for helping others, she became the editor of one of our sites, 5 Minutes for Special Needs. She always gave every drop of support she could to anyone who needed love and help. We loved her so very, very much.
The blogging world has changed so much since those early days and now that Anissa Mayhew is gone, it feels even lonelier now.
But Anissa wouldn’t want us to give up on the bond of our community.
So blogging friends — here is to Anissa and what it means to have each other’s back, to love friends deeply, even if we rarely meet in person, and to laugh and fight back even when life is a bitch.
And so in honor of the Anissa and the good ole’ blogging days, after I shared my grief on Facebook, I came back to post this tribute here, on a blog where our friendships all began.
We LOVE YOU Anissa and we miss you already! Thank you for being so incredibly fabulous!!!
Written by Janice Croze, co-founder of 5 Minutes for Mom
Talk with me: @5minutesformom and Facebook.com/5minutesformom
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So sad and so well said, Janice. Thank you for the memories! That Nikon party was a big deal for me. I attended, invited as a guest of Liz Thompson, an OG blogger who I looked up to and admired. BlogHer ’09 was the first time I met Anissa and was in awe of everything that radiated from her. She was truly inspiring and welcoming to someone like me who felt so small in what seemed like a large blogosphere. I remember her rushing around trying to coordinate for one of the chaotic parties, but not missing a beat.
You hit it on the head that it isn’t like it was back then. We visited each other online and commented back then. Not as a chore but because we loved each other and were interested in what was happening in each others’ lives. The blogging community was in its infancy then and wouldn’t be what it is today without leadership like Anissa, you, Susan, Kelby Carr, Liz Thompson, Lori Falcon and so many more. It saddens me that “younger” bloggers are focused on what is behind the door instead of stepping back and absorbing the words of the OG voices as they gush about memories of the good ol’ days. Anissa will be greatly missed and will remain a solid memory of what blogging was like back then.
Thank you for this beautiful tribute. Anissa’s leadership, and that of her entire family, especially after 2009, was a huge inspiration to me too. Here’s to an incredible voice who changed lives with her generosity.. #freeanissa
Amen!
Dropping a comment here because that’s just what we used to do back then. Back when we had words of joy or grief or frustration to share. Anissa was one of the first people ever to post a comment on ‘Mommy Confessions’ when I first started back in 2006. Seems like such a very long time since those days.
I know there will be a lot of people thinking about Anissa and those early days of the blogging community for weeks and months to come. <3
Can you imagine if FB had never happened, if we still all met up at each other’s blogs? Those were sweet days. But things never can stay the same. We were just lucky to have been the few who got to live those moments. They were precious indeed. HUGS
Dear Janice, I just saw this on FB and can’t believe it. So devastating. And yes, it’s nice to remember those good old blogging days when the group was so much smaller and more intimate. Anissa, we will dearly miss you!
We are walking arm and arm down the old main street, reminiscing about when we were young and the blogosphere belonged to us…
Fabulous tribute to an amazing human being; you will be missed, Anissa.
Anissa was truly amazing… one of a kind. And profoundly missed by everyone.
She is missed indeed!!!
Im very sorry to hear of the loss! My condolences to all who knew her
Thank you! She was a gem!!!
I want to comment like the old days! Thank you for this tribute. Love and love and love to you and to Anissa’s family and to all the members of our beautiful small town before the railroad opened it up to the world.
Yay for old school comments!!!
Yes — all the new fandangled FB threads can’t replace what we built with each blog comment we made. It was the best of times.
Oh the wind & rain at the Nikon party! It did not slow it down.
Thank you for this. So nice to hear her voice.
I loved hearing her voice again, too.
I can’t believe it has been so long since those days. Oh how young we all were! lol I am so glad I still get to hear her voice and watch her smile and laugh!
Fighting back the tears while out to lunch with the hubs and kid 3.
This.
We are the small town overtaken by the railroad.
Thank you for putting it in a way that we can explain to anyone who may not understand our world.
HUGS!!!!!!
I miss those early years so much. I remember both of those interviews you did with Anissa so well. The last day has me getting all sentimental about the early years. She will be missed!
I remember that interview with Anissa and Peter like it was yesterday. I wish we were all back there now!!!
It is like we are all gathering together once again, hugging each other and sharing our tears. It is fitting of course, that we have to do that while we are all thousands of miles away from one another.
This is so beautiful. Her passing rekindled a longing in all of us that I believe we so badly need. Thank you, Anissa, for this final gift. The community will not be the same without you.
Yes, it is like Anissa has given us a final gift of bringing us all together again.
So true — she reminds us that community and love for each other is the reason for all of life, including blogging!
Perfectly said. And I LOVE that you said it here. <3
Thank you Andrea! I was up late — my 15 year old son had just come home from a trip with his dad and he was in a chatty mood. A part of me was saying to myself, you need to get to your computer to finish the post about Anissa. But I knew that the most important thing I could do to honor Anissa was to first give my son all of my attention and THEN write the blog post at 1am. Cause that is how we old school bloggers roll, right?
I did not know her… I knew of her! What a force. Such a lovely tribute! I am a blogger and I love all of us still blogging away!
Her light still illuminates!
Yes — Anissa’s light is still here for sure!
This is lovely. Yesterday’s news and the community sharing their memories of her made me miss the old days so so much.
Yes, it is so sad that it takes a tragedy to bring everyone together again… but life is always like that.
These last 24 hours have really made me realize what an amazing time we all had together and how important it is to prioritize community and supporting one another!
What a beautifully written post about Anissa and an era of blogging that so many of us miss dearly. Much love to you both!
Thank you Leticia! Love to you too!!!
What a beautiful tribute! I miss those beautiful early days of blogging. Anissa was such a force to be reckoned with. I will miss her beautiful face and humor so very much. Thank you for sharing these interviews- I loved watching them!
Yes…. she was “such a force to be reckoned with.”
Isn’t it fabulous to watch her and hear her voice again. I love her strength!!!
This is just beautiful and so true. I miss those days deeply. I never was able to get to know Anissa the way others did but I followed her, read her stories and know that she was loved, admired and a force to follow. A true leader. An inspiration. Thank you for sharing. God Bless Anissa. Her and her family are in my thoughts and prayers.
It is so nice to see your smiling face next to your comment. It is like a reunion around here. HUGS!!!!
This is so fantastic, Janice. I miss those days so much and you penned it perfectly. I am so grateful for those times we had to learn and grow together and for the community we share. I stopped blogging 18 months ago, and this is making me want to resurrect it. Just for the pure love of writing and community once again.
Anissa is #notaninspiration but will always be one of my favorite badasses.
I love how Anissa would have never wanted to “be an inspiration”… she was such an awesome badass.
Yes – this terrible loss reminds us what we had and makes me want to spend more time writing those meaningful, community focused posts again. That badass inspires us whether she likes it or not! lol
I did not connect wirh Anissa back in those “good old days”. Somehow I missed out! But thank you so much for the trip down memory lane. I loved our years in blogland and still miss it. I am so thankful to still be in touch with many of those friends, many of whom are closer friends than those IRL! I was privileged to meet my 12th blogging buddy just last week and it was as seamless as if we talked every day. I remember you and your support of my grand twins before they were born. They’re 9 now and are so incredibly smart and beautiful. I was Call Me Grandma Dawn.
Oh I remember you Grandma Dawn!!! Susan and my baby girls are nine now too. We are all so blessed to have had those years together!
Dear Janice,
You have lovingly defined those early years of blogging perfectly….and wrote such a beautiful tribute to Anissa–a one of a kind–never-to-be-found-again woman! She brought Psalm 139:14 to life! She was fearfully and wonderfully made and we know that all her days were ordained before one of them came to be–she lived them full, she lived them well as only Anissa could. I will be joining the many others in praying for Peter and her children….this is a gut punch to all of us, this is a deeply felt heart loss for her entire family. We pray peace that passes all understanding and comfort as they walk through these days of great loss. Janice…this was a beautiful tribute to a beautiful life. <3 Diane
She was definitely one of a kind! Sometimes I would be so shocked by something she would say — she reminded me not to take life, or ourselves, too seriously. Thank you for your kind words!
I love this so much. I miss those early days with a deep heartache. I’m so glad we got to experience something special like that time. Anissa’s impact is loud and clear, even after all these years. I’m so glad that can never be taken away.
Love,
Steph
<3
Yes. So many memories that can never be taken away.
Such a special time! It was magical. We are SO blessed that we got to experience it and to form such true relationships. HUGS to you my sweet friend!
Love! ❤️ it’s so true, I miss those days! Anissa was always such a hoot and so real and fun!
YES. Such a hoot.
A hoot indeed! Such a riot. She always kept everyone laughing and often a little shocked. LOL
This is a beautiful tribute and I love your description of the early blogging community vs what it is today. I love where I am now but I do miss those days.
I too was shocked and saddened to hear of Anissa’s passing yesterday. Thank you for posting this. xoxo
Yes, the news is so shocking and sad… I can’t stop thinking about it. I’ve been re-reading many of her old posts on her blogs and on our old 5 Minutes for Special Needs.
Those early blogging days were such an amazing slice of history that won’t ever be repeated. I agree, it’s wonderful that we can earn full time incomes from blogging now, but nothing will replace the early community.
So shocking indeed! I was so confused when I read Kelby’s FB post. I frantically started reading through threads tryign to figure out what had happened. SO sad!