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You Can’t Weigh Your Worth on a Scale #WeighThis

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This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

Susan here with a new way to look at weighing yourself. I’m pleased to help spread this empowering message to women by joining in a campaign sponsored by Lean Cuisine.

The battery in my bathroom scale is dead.

I’ve been half-meaning to replace it for the last couple months so that I can weigh myself again, but the other half of me doesn’t want to look at the number anymore.

Since I’ve hit 40 years old, I’ve been gradually packing on more and more extra weight. To be honest, it’s frustrating because my clothes aren’t fitting well and I know I’m not putting exercise as a high enough priority.

But I can sincerely say that while I’m not feeling my best with this extra padding around my middle, I truly do NOT value myself by the number on my scale.

Yes, I do want to get more exercise and feel more fit.

But no, I do not measure my worth by the weight on my scale.

Society and the mass media we consume daily try to force me to buy into the lie that my appearances determine my worth, but I’ve never really been sold.

Throughout my life, I have valued my intelligence, my friendly personality and ability to put people at ease, my creativity and my success at school and work. My looks and weight were lower on the list.

Although, while I was more impressionable in my teens and early twenties, I did struggle somewhat with wanting to be even thinner than I was. (Despite the fact I was already thin.) My twin sister and I would read magazine articles about dieting to get your bikini body before summer and then eat grapefruits and carrot sticks as we tried to follow ridiculous diets.

Now as a mother of two young girls, I don’t want them to worry about the weight on a scale. I don’t want them to fall victim to those magazine articles and advertisements.

So I love to see companies like Lean Cuisine promoting a positive message to women. What an awesome brand transformation — from the frozen diet food of my teen years to this…

Watch this video to see what I mean…

How Would You Want To Be Weighed?

Like the women in this video, there are so many other ways that I’d rather be weighed than by a number on a scale.

I want to be weighed by my hard work building a business while raising my two girls as a single mother, co-parenting (and getting along with) my ex-husband.

What Matters To Me Is Supporting and Raising My Family

What matters to me is being a mother and showing my girls how to work hard and support yourself and your family. Kindness and forgiveness are paramount in my world.

No Time for Makeup

Most days I don’t take the time to put on makeup and style my hair, but I do take time for what’s important… my girls!

What if instead of judging ourselves by our appearances and physical weight, we all weighed ourselves by how much love we shared?

Or we weighed ourselves by…

  • How many people we helped in our lifetime?
  • How many people we made smile?
  • How many paying jobs we created for other people to support their own families?
  • How many classes we taught or articles we wrote?
  • How many inspirational stories we told?
  • How many meals we made?
  • How many hugs we gave?

There are so many wonderful ways we can weigh the impact we have in our world. And none of them require a scale.

What ways would you rather be weighed?

I truly want to hear what you’re proud of and what really matters to you…

Please leave a comment below.

If you’re a blogger, you can leave a link to your blog. I will collect a selection of responses to share in a follow up post and will link to your blog.

Spread the Word

Help us keep the message going… you can easily tweet using one of the links below.

[Tweet “You Can’t Weigh MY Worth on a Scale! #WeighThis”]

 

Disclosure: Thanks to Lean Cuisine for sponsoring this post and thank you for reading.
Written by Susan Carraretto, co-founder of 5 Minutes for Mom
Talk with me: @5minutesformom and Facebook.com/5minutesformom
Pin with me at pinterest.com/5minutesformom

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63 Comments

  1. I agree – I just eat healthy and exercise and never weigh myself.. People should feel empowered to feel good about their accomplishments (including social good as you said) instead of just the outside!

    Reply

  3. Hi Susan! This is a very inspiring post. I also am really enjoying all the comments from wonderful women “weighing in”. I want to be measured and weighed by the joy I feel to know that as a single Mom I raised 2 amazing young men, and I feel their love and appreciation for me every day. I want to be thought of as someone who followed their dreams, and helped others, particularly with health. My fascinating with health and nutrition started in the 1970s when I travelled to study yoga and meditation and healthy living in Europe and Hawaii. I am a life-long learner, and I love sharing what I learn with others through my blogs, webinars, teleclasses, and newsletters. My life is so full, and I love meeting other women dedicated to making their lives and those they touch, more rewarding and happy. Thanks for this opportunity! Diana

    Reply

  4. What an empowering message. New moms always feel immense pressure to lose their baby weight the minute they leave the hospital. They see celebrities who are one month post-delivery looking like they could rock a Victoria’s Secret runway. I wish new moms (myself included) would be weighed by how fiercely they love their children, by how much they sacrifice and how well they persevere through the tough times.

    Reply

  5. Your thoughts are a familiar echo to many conversations I have had recently with friends or overheard as women are sharing their insecurities and concerns about where they fit, how they fit, and what it all should look like.
    Just this weekend a friend and I met for coffee and much of this was hiding underneath some frustrations shared. Ultimately, we decided that though we didn’t enjoy those extra blessings ( ;0) ) that came with aging, what we did appreciate is the down-to-earth centeredness that does. Like you, we are ever so grateful for the time with our kids, the chance to encourage one another and build other women in our lives up by leading them to see His grace and beauty in them.

    Thank you for sharing an encouraging post that leads others well.
    Blessings!
    Dawn

    Reply

  6. I would rather be weighed by my smarts, resilience, determination, and sense of humour. As a mother of two young girls, I’m very aware that everything I say and do influences them. I want them to grow up without the tyranny of the scale. I want for them to believe in themselves. I want them to be kind and loving and compassionate, and that means I need to be kind and loving and compassionate to those around them, myself included.

    Reply

  7. I’ve given up on being pick about the number on the scale over the last year. I finally bought my first two-piece bathing suit and I’ve been wearing it all summer — I just LOVE it! Confidence begets confidence for sure! 😀

    I’d like to be weighed by how hard I’ve worked over the last two years, especially. Moving to blogging and writing full time, and now two years later my partner has quit his 12 year career to join me. IT FEELS SO GOOD! 😀

    Reply

  8. We don’t have a scale in our house, and we talk to our daughters about having healthy strong bodies. I feel strongly that we need to emphasize the Spirit within ourselves and get away from placing importance on our outer selves. My daughters feel proud that they can run and climb playground equipment (and trees) with their strong muscles, and I feel proud that they don’t care what they wear or how they look in their clothes.

    Reply

  9. Thanks for the positive message and I agree it is not about the number on the scale! We are so tough on ourselves.

    Reply

  10. Hi Susan,

    I absolutely love your post and find it so inspiring!
    Being a woman (mom) is not easy. We take on so much, give out generously and judge ourselves way too easily. I would like to be weighted in for my positive attitude, resilience, ambition and for the good I do to others (including my family). #weighThis

    http://www.coolbusymoms.com/

    Reply

  12. I totally agree! We cannot weigh our worth on a scale. I’d like to be weighed by my love for my family – they are absolutely the most important thing in my life! My immediate family is small – there are just three of us – but they are everything to me. We also have a huge extended family that also mean the world to me.

    Reply

  13. Wonderful article Susan. I would like to be weighed by the many techniques I show other moms to save money for their families. By showing moms how they can save may just help them teach their children to develop these great techniques as they get older.

    Reply

  14. Thank you for this opportunity. I would like to be weighed on my love to help others achieve their dreams by providing them with information about businesses they can do even with a shoe-string budget, working from home. I’ve been learning about online marketing and thought someone out there may also be needing the information. I have taught my children to be business minded as well. I don’t want them to struggle in life but to be financially independent and be able to help others.

    Reply

  15. Thank you so much for making such an important point. I would want to be weighed by the good that I’ve done in the world and the ways I’ve positively impacted the people throughout my life. I would emphasize what I do for others or the world at large that doesn’t necessarily have any benefit to myself.

    Reply

  16. I would rather be weighed on my kindness. My thoughtfulness. Presence. Availability. Willingness to help. Advocacy, Care. Consideration. Concern. Love of laughter. Creativity. Sharing my gifts with others. Time…
    So right. There are so many wonderful ways we can weigh the impact we have in our world. And none of them require a scale. Fab video and concept – thanks for the invite to pop over and participate…

    No, my worth can’t be weighed on a scale! #WeighThis

    Reply

  17. This is such a powerful and positive message! I love it!

    I would like to be weighed by the people I have helped and uplifted. By the smiles I
    have put on small sad faces. By the skills and life lessons I have taught to those around me.

    http://www.anxioustoddlers.com

    Reply

  18. I want to be weighed in how my new business can help moms across the country. As a new mom struggle with finding functional clothing and accessories that are nursing/baby friendly but where I can also wear them to work. I’m now finding fashions, like #chewelry, that make it easy for mom to transition from daywear to office to even styles for a night out. I think every mom needs them! But building a business is tough when you work full time, and are a mom. I write about mom life hacks and business updates on my blog here: http://www.wearmilla.com/blog/

    Reply

  19. I’d like to be weighed by how I am as a mother and wife. Also, I want to be known as a caring person who would help anyone and who loves people. There’s so much more joy in life when serving others.

    Reply

  20. I would like to be weighed by the amount of encouragement I gave to others whether in person or by something I have written. I would love to be weighed by how I touched other’s lives including the lives of my family in a very positive way. I love the question!

    Reply

  21. I have a horrible habit of weighing myself with everything negative. I’d like to be judged on parenting of my young children ages 11, 10 and 8 as well as my adult child who’s 24 now, and the joy of being a grandparent to a 2-year-old like sweetie pie. I’d also be judged by my writing career … about 20 years or so now.

    This post is great. It’s something I need to read at least three more times and get this inside of my head.

    Petula Writes at http://www.petulaw.com

    Reply

    • Yes Petula, we all need to remind ourselves of this each day.

      It is so easy to let negative thoughts into our minds.

      Reply

  22. I want to be weighted by the number of people I have made feel better about their lives. I want to be weighted by the number of people who have felt validation from spending time with me or reading something I have written. I want to be weighed by the number of people I have helped see the world as more beautiful than they saw it as before. I want to be weighted by my impact on people.

    Reply

  23. I like to hope that I’ll be remembered when I’m gone by family, friends, and those I’ve helped through volunteering. But in the meantime, I think the impact I want to have and what I’d be most proud of is what my kids think of me as their mom and that we’ve connected and made memories in our years together.

    Grown Ups Magazine
    http://grownupsmag.com

    Reply

    • How wonderful that you spend time volunteering. That is worth so much.

      Yes, making memories with our kids is so valuable.

      Reply

  24. Susan
    This is hands-down the very best post I have read in a while, and I will be sharing the link on my blog tomorrow!
    Being healthy is important, but nobody is a number on a scale!
    I have always told my children they are my biggest accomplishment – and I would be honored to be weighed for the amount of influence I have had upon their character, their successes, and their kind and giving spirits!
    What matters most to me in life is to try to be kind and tolerant, attempt to do my best, find ways to make life a little better for others, and (as my blog name reflects), to make the most of every moment.
    Thank you for this post – from another twin named Susan! http://www.ofeverymoment.com

    Reply

    • Thank you so very much Susan! That means a lot.

      Yes, how we raise our children and the kindness we show in life are so much more important than our weight.

      Thank you for sharing.

      Reply

  25. I’m thinking about how I want my daughter to weigh her worth. I want her to weigh her worth by her integrity, by the time and love she gives her family, by the way she chases her dreams, and by the way her Heavenly Father values her. I want her to see that we aren’t to be judged worthy by the ways that media tells us we should – true beauty is a strong woman who genuinely cares about those around her and isn’t too proud to be kind to anyone.

    I could give you a pretty long list of what beauty ISN’T… but I should probably save that for a blog post. 😉

    Lindsey from kindredspiritmommy.com

    Reply

  26. Thank you Lean Cuisine. I only recently bought a scale. I threw mine out in my late 20s because that up and down ridiculous scale watching business was really awful and no good for my health. I hear you on the 40s. I am 45 and it gets harder to boost metabolism after 40. 45 is even worse. So I exercise more and work hard to get to the gym and be active but it is very hard to see weight sticking. I hope to be weighed as someone who helped others and used her voice for good. That’s all that matters to me and of course how my kids, family and friends view me. I hope to be weighed for my love for my kids, my commitment to other adoptive families and my love for kids with special needs. I weigh things differently than I did in my 20s.

    http://www.thriftymommastips.com

    Reply

    • Absolutely! I have gone without a scale many times in my life. It can be refreshing to not look at one.

      Thank you for sharing.

      Reply

  27. What a beautifully told story!! When I was pregnant, I had major self esteem issues bc my SIL was pregnant at the same time and gained half the amount of weight that I did. People were comparing us and making comments about how huge I was getting. I HATED IT. And truthfully, I didn’t mind the weight gain because to me, it meant a healthy baby. However, the negative comments made me feel poorly about my self image. I felt like I wasn’t supposed to be gaining as much weight as I did… I wish people would have measured my worth based on how much love I was holding for my unborn child. I was researching parenting styles, breastfeeding, babywearing, homemade baby food recipes, nursery decor and all sorts of things as I longingly awaited to hold my baby. If only people would have stopped judging me based on my weight gain and looked at my motherhood potential instead!!

    Thanks for sharing this story. I’m a blogger at http://www.mommyandlove.com and I just know my readers would love to read your message. I’ll pass it along to them.

    Reply

    • Monica, I am so sorry that people allowed you to feel badly during your pregnancy. You’re right that you were growing a healthy baby and THAT was what mattered.

      People can be so weirdly obsessed with the amount of weight a woman gains during her pregnancy… when really, the important thing is that you stay healthy and gain enough weight to grow a healthy baby.

      Janice and I were pregnant at the same time (4 days apart) and it sometimes was hard to have our bellies compared… but we are so used to that since we’re identical twins.

      Reply

  28. Susan,

    This is such a great post to read because I have struggled with weight issues since I was a teenager. My Mom was determined to keep me fit and skinny while I lived under her roof, and she did a remarkable job of it. When I went to college my first year, I gained the typical 15 lbs plus 15 more. Then I decided to join the Army and had to go on a crash diet and lose all 30 lbs to obtain a contract. I did it!
    Then life threw me a curve ball, and I got pregnant. I gained well over 100 lbs with her due to many MAJOR complications throughout the entire pregnancy. My hormones have never been the same since! I am still obese due to a hormone imbalance that I can’t control without medication. Unfortunately, when you lack proper insurance that’s hard to come by.

    I am still ME on the inside. I’m still smart, easy going, and a proven leader. I’m a dedicated worker who strives to produce quality work in all that I do. Like yourself, I also have built a blog from the ground up. I even obtained my college degree online while raising kids and working outside the home. I want to be weighed on the things that I have accomplished regardless as to what my weight is according to a scale.

    I hate to say this, but I have always been treated completely different since I’ve gained weight than I was when I was skinny. Too many people only see the outside of someone first and make their predictions about people based on those facts alone. They end up missing out on getting to know some truly remarkable people!

    Reply

    • Crystal, I am so sorry that you have experienced people treat you differently after having gained weight. But sadly, I believe that is true… that many people react and treat people in certain ways based on how much they weigh.

      I hope that one day that will change.

      It’s so tough when hormones and other issues like that make it hard to maintain the weight you want. I think our genetic body types make a big difference too. Some people – especially kids – can eat anything and still not get overweight while others start struggling while they are still just little kids. It is unfair.

      But the more we can help spread the message that we should weigh ourselves on who we are as people and what we accomplish to help and serve others, the better the world will be.

      Thank you for sharing your story!

      Reply

  29. I haven’t jumped on a scale in years. I will not be defined by a number on the scale. Could I stand to lose some pounds? Sure. But I would rather be known for my hard work, giving nature and loyal heart. THAT is who I am; me weight is not.

    Reply

  30. I’d like to be weighed by my resilience, persistence, and ability to make something beautiful out of a terrible situation. My husband and I were full-time college students and we had an infant when I was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer. Since then, I’ve completed chemotherapy, radiation, 5 surgeries, so many hospital overnights that I lost count, and a bachelors degree. I saw my baby graduate from kindergarten, launched a freelance writing career, and every day I work to help other women thrive while living with cancer through my writing projects and volunteer work with organizations like the Young Survival Coalition.

    Reply

  31. Love this post. I’m a 45 year old single parent to a 5 year old girl. I was super athletic and slim before I had her. Now, not so much. Funny thing is that I have what I jokingly refer to as “reverse body dysmorphia”. I walk around all day long thinking I look like Gwyneth Paltrow and then see a photo of myself and don’t recognize ME! I rarely weigh myself, and certainly don’t want to be measured or judged as a person by a number on a scale. I eat well and exercise, but being thin isn’t my number one priority.

    I’m proud to be known as someone who has taken huge risks and leaps of faith, is a great listener, is an optimist. I would absolutely always prefer that my friends say that I’m a terrific parent, that I’m genuine, trustworthy, supportive, and FUNNY, than say anything (positive or negative) about my physical appearance as if it is a measure of my quality as a person.

    Reply

  32. I want to be weighed by the smiles my daughter gives me when I get something “just right”! This was a lovely post and great reminder for Moms. Thanks for sharing it.

    Reply

  33. I totally agree! I don’t know what my “normal” weight is because I rarely look at the scale (except when pregnant, because my doctors with my first two wanted to know about weight gain – midwives are much less concerned about that so I haven’t even been weighed this pregnancy!). I agree with you that I’d much rather be weighed by how I helped my friends, encouraged other moms, or what I put into my kids. What really matters to me is the people around me, not what size they are. 🙂 Thanks for sharing!

    Reply

  35. First of all, absolutely beautiful post and video – it brought tears to my eyes! What am I proud of, and what really matters to me? I definitely have to say that I’m most proud of my children. I have two boys, both teens now, who are growing up and demonstrating that I’ve done some things right! They’re making good choices and are GOOD young men! The other thing that really matters to me, as an Occupational Therapist, is my ability to help others and truly make a difference in their lives. I LOVE that I get to do that! Thank you for this post!

    Reply

  36. I am a Mom, Stepmom, Wife, Sister, Daughter, Aunt, Friend, PTA President, High School employee and Writer. I have lived through and escaped a dangerous, abusive man I was with for 6 years. I wrote about the effects of that. I once lived everyday afraid it would be my last at the hands of my abuser. I want to be weighed as a Survivor. I am now married to the perfect husband, have 3 beautiful boys who have been raised to respect others (an women), work because I want to and not because I have to. I survived 6 years of torture and if my story helps even 1 other victim and brings hope then that is the legacy I want to leave. http://www.parentinghealthy.com/

    Reply

  37. YES!! This, YES!!!

    We are so much more than a number on the scale! It can be so disheartening to work hard, exercise, make good food choices, and see the number not move (or move in the wrong direction). It puts a damper on the day.
    Personally, I have given up stepping on the scale. I am choosing to focus on how my clothes fit for weight loss, and to focus on the whole of my life for how I’m doing.

    In the past week, I’ve seen FB posts from friends ranging from the death of their 5 year old cousin to a woman fighting cancer, but losing. I want to be remembered as a Mama that gave all to her family, not as a woman fighting with the scale.

    Great advice in this post!!!

    Reply

  38. I’d like to be weighed by my dedication and hard work! I didn’t give up until I was able to quit a job I hated and blog full time – and I couldn’t be happier 🙂

    Reply