Okay Girls…
I am holding a little stick and it has TWO lines – and NO ONE is answering their phone! And I am not the kind of girl that can keep this kind of information to herself!
In disbelief, with the 2nd line just beginning to appear, I phone my husband. He tells me not to get my hopes up. Now I will give him some grace because I did say the line was very faint – and I did lose our last baby. But he is very much a man and does NOT scream like a girl anyway, so his reaction was far too calm for my needs.
So next I go tell my mom. Even less of a reaction. “Hmmm…” “Isn’t it great news Mom?” “Hmmm…” “Do you think I can handle it?” “No.”
Okay – I will give her grace too. She was the one that spent the first two months of my son’s life helping me do everything as I tried to cope with post pardum depression, a sick body and a newborn.
But girls – I need to hear someone scream with delight.
I phone Susan. She had just picked up Jackson and taken the kids to the YMCA. She should still be driving. She has her phone turned off. Good grief.
I phone my friend Dawn. No answer.
I phone my friend Crystal. No answer.
So what do I do now?
I call you!
So dear internet – let me hear a loud “girl” scream – cause there are two lines!!!
Now, I know I just lamented to you on Tuesday saying that I knew I was not pregnant. But you must understand, I was trying soooo hard not to get my hopes up. This has been a long season of trying to conceive. I lost a baby at the beginning of November 2005 and each month since then it has felt like a lost another one as my hopes crashed with that horrible moment I see that my period has come.
My son has cried and screamed at God because he wants a brother or sister. He has wept asking me why God has not given us another baby yet. “But you had one baby in your belly Mommy – I remember.” (Just so you know – I don’t bring up the subject with him. He does. I just tell him that it can take a very long time to get a baby. It took Auntie three years to get Julia and sometimes we don’t always get another baby. His response, “Well that isn’t what I want for my life.” He then closed himself in the closet and cried.) Just in case you are wondering – I won’t be telling him about this baby until I am showing and I can hide it no longer. Last time I tried to wait, but when I was puking in the kitchen sink and he kept asking why Mommy was sick I gave in and told him. This time I will be more careful.
Last month I was finished with trying. I couldn’t bear the disappointment. I didn’t even pay attention to when I was supposed to be ovulating. I thought that that would make me not hope.
It didn’t work. My hope was still as strong – refusing to give up despite my attempts to beat it down.
I hoped.
I waited.
Period due yesterday. I kept going to “check.” No “news.”
This morning I peed on the stick.
And yes girls – there are two lines!!!
P.S. I know I could very well miscarry this baby. I know it is barely even there yet. But girls – you know I will tell you if I have a miscarriage anyway – how could I keep that from you?!? So I figure I will tell you all now because I need two very important things from you: First, I need to hear a scream of delight – preferably many. And second, I need you to pray that this baby gets to stay! …Thanks girls – a girl can always count on you all – as BooMama said – you all are the best internets in the world.
139 Comments
YIPPEEE! What exciting news! Congratulations and best wishes for a trouble free, exciting nine months of waiting! God is GOOD!!
Awesome news!! We’re thinking good thoughts for you and your growing family!
Like with ONE HUNDRED AND TWO comments you need one more, but here goes anyway…
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!
And lotsa prayers!!
YAHOOOOO!!! I lost a baby (isn’t that a horrible way to say it? I NEVER lost the baby…I knew exactly where she was…) in November 1988, and found out in Jan 1989 that I was pregnant again. I walked on eggshells and didn’t really believe it would happen until my second darling daughter was born. Now she is 17, and I love her tons…and I appreciate SO much that she wouldn’t be here if my tragedy wouldn’t have happened. Now I know I have a sweet baby waiting for me in Heaven (I even named her Emily, but nobody knows that…) AND I have 5 wonderful kids here on earth.
I pray that you hold this baby in your hands — healthy and full term. Even if you don’t, you will always hold her in your heart.
AHHHHHHHHH do you hear roo screaming from her prairie home? because she is!!! YAH GOD!!! Bless that baby belly!
Congratulations to you my dear. I read your blog one other time a few days ago when you had posted about not thinking you were pregnant. I also read your previous post you had linked to and my heart broke. I have been struggling with this very thing and your words are exactly what my heart has been crying out with.
I am so excited for you. Your news has brought hope back for me this month. Congratulations to you, dear. May God richly bless you and your family.
I know that I am late getting in here, but congrats to you! I will keep all of you in my prayers. I agree that if you would tell if you miscarried, then you should share the good news, no matter how early.
My daughter was 4 1/2 when I miscarried and was SO happy to be getting a baby. It was an early 2nd trimester miscarriage, so she had known for a couple of weeks. It was so hard to tell her, and like Jackson, she grieved for that baby (and still remembers him 4 years later). I was also very careful about not telling her when I got pregnant. I had to be careful about telling “real-life” friends, too, because that’s how she found out the first time. But I told all my email buddies really soon.
My sweet Kyle was worth the wait, and I know that your guy or gal will be too.
Hi honey!!!
AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
I am so happy for you!!! Congratualtions!!
remember me… i am your australian canadian chickie!!!:)
hehehe
guess you won’t have any tampons around the house to stick behind your ear for a while huh:) I love you Janice:)
WhHHHHOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOO!
It took me three years to get pregnant the first time, and about a year and a half the second time. I know all too well the misery that seeing your period each month brings- I’d hide in the bathroom and cry.
Saying a little prayer for you that all goes well…
OH MY GOSH!!!! YOU’RE PREGNANT?!?! That’s not what I expected to read today! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! Keep the faith, Janice. I’ll pray that you have a take home baby!
Laughter, tears,
CONGRATULATIONS
WOW – your in my prayers – my sister recently lost a baby and just recently got pregnant – I beleive in my heart all will be well and Jackson will get his little gift from God! (As will you) – but you better tell him to LOOK OUT – they are not all they are cracked up to be LOL I have 2 that are about 4 years apart in age and it’s SOOO hard
MUCH LOVE!!!
Wow!! Awesome! Wonderful!! Babies are good. I hope this pregnancy works out well for you all!
Okay I missed this big news! What a blessing. I will be praying for you. Incidentally I became a mom in the legal sense this weekend. Children are a blessing from the Lord!
WOOO-HOOOOO! Congrats to you! Yay!
YYYYYAAAAAAYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!
CONGRATULATIONS!!! Saying a prayer for BABY JANICE right now!!
Oh Dear God protect this baby and help it grow big and healthy and strong, amen, Amen, AMEN!!!!!!
Ahhhhhhhhhh!!! YAAAAAYYYYYYY! WOOOOOOHOOOOO!!!!
I am way behind, but YAY! Congratulations! This is such exciting news!
Congrats! I have been there… done that… this baby is going to be just fine! Its something you feel deep inside!
Coming late to the cheering party. What a blessing for you and your family. Prayers for you and your little one in the belly, so that s/he can keep on happily growing for the next 9 months. Best wishes!
Oh my goodness!!!! I just now saw this!!
CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I will be praying for you!!!
lots of hugs!
Girly screams from south Georgia. I’m so excited for you and really hoping and praying that everything goes well. Take care of yourselves!
Praise God! I don’t know you at all, but I’m sending up a prayer and a scream of happiness all at the same time. New life is always a blessing to be celebrated, no matter how fleeting. I hope each day is filled with joy amidst the inevitable anxiety.
Woo hoo! Congratulations! I pray God’s blessings upon you and your little miracle.
WHOO!HOO! THAT IS FANTASTIC! CONGRATULATIONS!
congratulations! i just saw two lines january 5. so we are close together. this is my fourth and my mom was not excited either!
Congratulations!
Congratulations! Fantabulous! I’m hootin’ and hollerin’ for you. Most of all I will pray that the God who knit that child together in your womb will put His hand of peace on you and allow you to walk every moment in His grace, trust, and love. You have a treasure inside your womb right now and I pray that you will be reminded of the treasure you’ve already been given with your son. As mothers, we are only stewards of these gifts and have to leave them in the Lord’s hands, as HARD as that is from the day of conception forward. May the Lord strengthen you and guide you each step of the way!
“And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and yours minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:7
Love,
Elisa
wow! awesome!!!!!all the BEST and take care
CONGRATULATIONS!!! I am new to this site. But I successfully overcame infertility twice. It’s so exciting. I wish you all the best with this pregnancy!!!
OH JOY!!!!! This particullarily tickled me ‘faint-but-ever-so-there-pink’ since I too (sshhhhhhhhhh!) peed on a on Tuesday (Jan 30th) and had a plus sign! I miscarried too last time, so I only told my friend and hubby so far.
Joy joy joy – and hope!
I peed since my friend called and said she had a dream. I’ll have to blog about it once I go public . . . for now, this is as public as I’ll go since OMWORD we’re finding this out about the same time!
Yaaaaahhhhhhhooooooo & Congratualtions from this lurker.
Many Blessings!
Am I too late for you to hear my screams of joy for you??? I have included you in my prayers sweetie…that this is the baby youre dreaming of!
Praising Him with you, and praying.
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!! Praying for you all the way from Malaysia!
OMG! Congrats!!!!! I will keep you in my prayers. I know the fear that comes with being pg after a miscarriage.
Isn’t it just like that, that as soon as you stop trying to make something happen, it happens on its own?
Methinks you were stressing yourself out so much with all of the worrying and the trying, and when you finally “gave up” and relaxed, your body could stop dealing with the stress and go back to doing its own thing.
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*hands you a big bottle of Tums*
Congratualtions! MY second husband and I have not been able to have a cild, to our great disappointment. I have a wonderful bot of nearly 20 (good grief!) but that hasn’t lessened the heartache of not being able to have another, despite fertility treatment. HOwever, I do count my blessings, some women can’t have even one. So – best wishes for a healthy, trouble-free pregnancy with a screaming bundle of joy at the end ;0)
India
Hi everyone, I hope you will take the time to help me get a brand new website off to a decent start, by saying a little something for me to remember and admire you for.
Respectfully,
Robin M. Holy
http://www.mommyoz.com
December 18th 2007
hey how are you
hey melissa how are you
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