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Have you ever left a conversation or an event and just wished you could do it all over again?
Maybe you would change everything about it or maybe you would just change a look or a word – but you can’t. It is over. And you are left with regret burning your insides as you replay over and over what you wish you had done, said or even been.
So here I am – my mind aching over the memories. It isn’t anything big. I didn’t even do anything “wrong.” But in my heart, I know I failed my Lord.
Nothing went wrong. I didn’t fall into a huge sin or embarrass myself. But at the end of the night I felt damaged and lost. I couldn’t place what was wrong. I crawled into bed still uneasy.
But tonight at Bible Study, the Lord made it clear.
I had walked into a room full of people and didn’t even realize that I had forgotten to pray. I had not brought the Lord with me. I had left Him at home and gone alone. The night was all about me and I had forgotten my purpose.
The reality of sin is that even when we confess deeply and sincerely we must live with the consequences. I will never know the consequences of this night on this side of Heaven. Maybe they were very little. But for that night I lived without consideration of my purpose and ignored the Spirit.
I know I learned a lesson I wish I would never forget again — Do not leave the Lord out, not even for a minute. He is my life and my joy. When I walk without Him I am weak, empty and without purpose. But when I invite the Holy Spirit in, then I am alive in Christ and able to be who I am called to be.
P.S. For more discussion on our purpose in life, check out our sister blog Faith Lifts. This month’s theme is Purpose and you can join in with us as we discuss our purpose with the blogger of the day.
And, if you remember, drop by Faith Lifts on Saturday. This week I will be writing about how I discovered the purpose of my life. I would love to see you there!
on the Rock says
Great reminder to make sure we include the Lord in on everything… when I think about that some more, it’s so deep. I think about so many interactions, with strangers or with family, etc., when we think the Lord is not there and cannot see. This is moving. Thanks.
Judi says
I can identify. Thanks for this post, it has a wonderful message.
(((HUGS)))
Rena says
Oh, how many times have I done that. And yes, you are so right..when I realize it, it hurts..literally…my heart hurts. Thanks so much for bringing the “prone to wander” tendancy that we all struggle with out into the light. Wonderful post, as usual. Hope you are feeling better.
Christina says
I think a lot of us have had experiences like this. I think it helps that we can recognize when it happens. I’m sure you will be more aware next time. You know don’t be too hard on yourself, we are only human.
amydeanne says
Do not leave the Lord out, not even for a minute. He is my life and my joy. When I walk without Him I am weak, empty and without purpose. But when I invite the Holy Spirit in, then I am alive in Christ and able to be who I am called to be.
A big lesson I’m learning. Thank-you
Erna says
Yep. I guess the biggest lesson for me has been, “When you fall down, you’ve got to get up!” I have had this all too often and definitely need to practice “taking the Lord with me” more often.
flipflopmamma says
If only we could go back and rewind. But ya know what? We wouldn’t need the Lord if that was the case.
Ruth says
yes, i can relate. so often i have thought about events that have taken place and longed to “rewind” the moment.
hindsight is 20/20 and as i “live” – i hope i am “learning”.
shalom to you!
Diane says
Yup! Guilty as charged! Thank God….he can use broken vessels!
Diane
Katrina says
Oh yes, Janice… Unfortunately, I have done this more often than I like to admit. I’m so thankful, though, that God doesn’t let me off the hook – He nudges me, reminds me, and gives me another chance. Thank you for sharing this.
Chaotic Mom says
Janice, this was beautiful. I’m afraid I’ve forgotten to bring God with me waaaaay too often. I look forward to reading your piece this Saturday. God HAS used you, even in this lesson of yours, and your sharing with others. 😉