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Last week, I posted about my sleep struggles with Olivia. Almost 60 of you wonderful moms chimed in, answering my questions about what sleeping arrangements work for you.
Thank you so much for your valuable input! I love to hear what other families are doing. It helps to learn from others’ experiences and to know that I am not the only one struggling.
Opinions can definitely vary when it comes to a personal decision like co-sleeping. But all of you were kind and respectful of other families’ choices. Thanks ladies!
So – what is happening over here?
Well, as Jennifer mentioned in her comment, I do have a complication when it comes to sleep sharing — since I never sleep! LOL (I do sleep eventually. But, like a lot of you other blogging and working moms, I work most nights until the wee hours.)
Therefore, whatever arrangement I work out needs to include Olivia in her crib for the first part of the night, since she wouldn’t be safe in a bed without me. (Hubby is a very deep sleeper, who sprawls in his sleep. He is not a safe co-sleeper.)
After much thought, last week I put a mattress on the floor in Olivia’s room for a little test run. I put her down to sleep when she was very sleepy after nursing. Then, when she woke for a feed a couple hours later, I nursed her and put her back to bed.
I went to bed at about 2am and she was still asleep. I decided to not wake her and I went to bed on the mattress. Shortly after, she roused and began to sit up. I reached my hand through the crib and stroked her head. To my surprise, she lay down and fell back to sleep.
But, at 3:30am she woke again, and this time she had no interest in going back to sleep. I scooped her up and brought her into bed with me. After nursing, she still did not want to go to sleep and proceeded to squirm around until 4:30 am. By this time I was ready to lose my mind with exhaustion, so I woke up Phil and asked him to rock Olivia to sleep and I retreated to our bedroom. (Phil didn’t get much sleep after that since he leaves for work at around 5:30am.)
The next night I picked up Olivia and put her on the mattress with me when I went to bed at 1:30am. But during the night she nursed, squirmed and didn’t settle into a deep sleep. Eventually Jackson came in shortly after 5am and woke us both up completely. By 5:45am I abandoned the idea of sleep and got up to start our day.
The next night I was tired, to say the least, and desperate. Phil was away, so I brought Olivia into our bed. Still no success. She woke often and early, neither of us getting a restful sleep.
SO, the next night, it was back to our old routine — the crib all night long.
And Olivia did well! The first night she woke at midnight. I had gone to bed already – since I was so tired from a week of no sleeping – and so I was asleep when I heard her. I got up to go to her, but before I went in her room I listened for a moment. She actually fell back to sleep and then slept till 7am! I couldn’t believe it!
I better knock on some wood here, because now, for the last three nights, she has slept through until morning.
She still isn’t sleeping ten hours+ straight, but at least she is sleeping for at least 6 hours between midnight and 6am. I hope to get her to sleep longer of course, but I am thrilled to have her not waking 5+ times during the night like she was a couple weeks ago.
We will see what will happen next. As I said last time, the one thing I have learned as a parent, is to never get too comfortable in one stage of parenting. “Babies whip through stages as quickly as they poop in a fresh diaper. You are only as good as your last diaper change.”
So, I realize that this is a work in progress. Tonight, I might have a decent sleep or no sleep at all!
What have I learned since last week?
I don’t think I have had any major revelations. I am just continuing on my path of being flexible and adjusting to each child individually.
Olivia has spent most of her night-time sleeping in her crib. When she is with me, I think it is distracting for her and disrupts her sleep. Yet, she is teething and looking for extra comfort in the night.
So, I will just continue to adapt and look for the solutions that work best for our entire family. I think that perhaps putting the mattress on the floor in her room worked to help break the habit her body was in of waking up every hour to be soothed back to sleep. Or maybe her teeth just stopped bugging her.
I can’t be sure, but I am grateful we are all getting a bit more sleep.
We will see what happens next… I will keep you posted. 😉
Petula says
I am so glad you and Olivia finally got some continued sleep… it is so restorative. It’s like a mini vacation when you’ve been deprived, huh? Well, good luck with the continued sleeping. I have high hopes for you. Happy snoozing.
mom2my9 says
I am SOOOO happy for you! I know exactly what you are going through because I have 7-month-old twins that sleep on either side of me. Sometimes it feels like I am literally breast feeding on one side or the other all night. Fortunately, though, I am so tired at night that I seem to be able to get right back to sleep.
Anyway, I can’t wait until mine will sleep six hours at the same time! Good for you for being so flexible and supporting your little girl by giving her what she needs. You’re doing great!
SarahHub says
I’m so glad you are getting some rest now!
Sleeping is our #1 challenge with Evie! She co-slept till 4 months, and then the battles began! She used to toss and turn and play like Olivia when we brought her into our bed. Now, at 20 months, there is no place she sleeps better than with us.
I think you have a great one-day-at-a-time attitude!
kellys says
I can SOOOOOOOO feel your pain. My 3.5 year old still doesn’t sleep through the night on a consistent basis. She co-slept with us for the first 6 months and then cried for the next year. We had no idea until my son was born that she was probably dealing with reflux. My son has slept by himself well for long stents since 5 weeks but at 6 months old, he started with the reflux. It was the same with TurkeyButt. Now she still has a hard time going to sleep and still sleeps better when in the bed with us. But she is getting better.
It is just tough. The “crying it out” scenario never worked with us. You jsut have to figure out with each one. If I lived near you, I would help you out. But from here, all I can do is pray for you and little Olivia. Take it from me, “this too shall pass”.
Amanda says
This made me chucke as I just posted a little shout out to co-sleeping… I am all for it! Just clck on my name to read…
Many continued blessings-
Amanda
Susanne says
Good luck to you, and I feel your pain!! I’m trying to wean my almost 3-year-old, and the reason I’ve been nursing him so long is because it’s helped me get some sleep. He’s been a terribly light sleeper from day 1, and nursing has enabled me to get some sleep myself. But now that he’s older and I know he can sleep longer by himself, I’m trying not to get into bed with him (he’s in a big boy bed) when he wakes at night. I just pick him up and walk around with him, which usually works. He’s doing better, and I know that “this too shall pass” eventually. It sure is hard when you’re going through it though! I keep saying…he won’t want me to sleep with him when he goes to college, so all will be okay. 🙂
Katrin says
I loved your last post! It made me feel better about part co-sleeping with my baby. She is 14 month now and she does sleep in her crib until about 2 or 3 am. I usually nurse her 2 times before I go to bed around 1 am. And I’m normally too tired to even remember the next morning when and how I brought her to our bed. She just wakes me around 7am to get more milk and I wonder how she got there! So that routine is working for us right now. I feel like at least she is getting some crib time so it won’t be too hard for her later to move to it all the way. And we all get some time to cuddle as well.
Amy says
I’m glad she is sleeping at least 6 hours for you. Hopefully she will continue to sleep that long or longer. It’s great that you adapt to what works best for her (and the entire family). What a great mom!
Heather says
I think you hit the key there…just being flexible and willing to try to find what works with each child!
Omie says
I hope you continue to get good sleep. I am putting off returning my baby to sleep in his crib since he’s teething and crabby now. Truly, I don’t look forward to all the crying that accompanies the task (from past experience). When I do, I hope it’s as smooth as yours.
Bailey's Leaf says
Hooray for you! Sleep is always a tricky thing with us moms. However, it seems as though you are on a positive road of sleep with her. Keep up the good work! 🙂
Moriah says
You know, I don’t think I’ve ever actually commented here before!
I do tend to pull my brand-spankin’ new babies into bed with me and nurse them while I doze. I usually put them back in the cradle at some point after a feeding, but sometimes not.
As my babies get older, though, they do exactly what you just described… they get distracted and stimulated, instead of being calmed.
We’ve had better success with nights all around without the co-sleeping, but that’s just our experience.
Lisa says
Hope all goes well and you continue to get plenty of sleep!
Doll Clothes Gal says
This is always a tough one. I’m a great believer in keeping baby’s sleeping habits quite seperate from mine – most times in a different room. But there are always the occasions when its best to co-sleep – for the benfit of both baby and you!
RebeccaC says
Time certainly does fly! It seems like only a few months ago I was struggling with babies and toddlers who didn’t share my opinion about sleep! Now they are all rushing headlong into adolescence! I’m glad that you’ve found what works (for now!) for Olivia. Every one of mine was different and while I did feel like a subject in a sleep-deprivation study for several years, looking back — I wouldn’t trade it for the world!!!
Hang in there! She’ll be driving before you know it! ;^)
Jennifer, Snapshot says
Thanks for the update. I was wondering. When thinking about these issues, I think you are exactly right — even when it seems so critical, it really will pass in a flash (in the grand scheme of things).
Anyway, I’m glad that Olivia is sleeping (and you are as much as you ever do LOL).
Ren says
We’ve battling Evie’s sleep schedule since she was 6 months old (she’s a year now). Every night is different. Thanks for sharing, makes me feel not so alone. ^^
Renee says
Ha the joy and pain of co-sleeping We are still co-sleeping with our 16 months old daughter (she sleep now in her crib in our bed room) but for the first year of her life she nurse night and day every 2 hour Yike!!!!
So co-sleeping was a necessity LOL but when she started to get mobile we had to put her down somewhere safe and out of reach of my hair LOL.
She now sleep 12 hour (trough the night) and on rare occasion she will need to be in our bed (teething, to cold etc…)
Thanks for sharing your story!!!
Grasping for Objectivity in my Subjective Life says
Babies are the biggest mystery of the world, aren’t they?! Don’t you wish that all babies heeded to the same logic and reasoning?
Congrats on getting some much needed sleep!!! I’ll be hoping it continues!!!