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Today, I made an almost fatal parenting mistake…

December 2, 2009 by Janice

This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

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olivia-rink-boredToday, I made an almost fatal parenting mistake – one of those “I only turned my head for a second” mistakes that could have ended my world.

I was trying to keep Olivia both contained and entertained at Jackson’s hockey practice.

The crayons, snacks, and “waving at Jackson on the ice” tricks had lost their appeal and Livvie was tearing from one side of the arena to the other.

I stood in the middle of her tracks, chasing her, picking her up and trying to drag her back to “watch Jackson.”

At one point, she was running down a short ramp lined with candy machines that led to a couple dressing rooms. It was a dead end, with nowhere for her to go. She generally just turned around at the end and ran back or stopped to play with the candy machines.

olivia-rink-running olivia-rink-candy

I was talking to a friend and watching her race about like a caged animal. I suppose I was somewhat lulled into a false sense of security by the familiarity of our surroundings and the fact that she really didn’t have anywhere she could go.

But I was terribly wrong.

She did have somewhere she could go… I had forgotten about the automatic sliding front doors that would open even for an unaccompanied toddler.

I suppose I must have turned my head for a second. I must have looked away for a moment. When I didn’t see Olivia come running back and I didn’t hear her little squeal, I raced down the ramp to the dressing rooms to see if she had run in there.

But she wasn’t there. She wasn’t anywhere.

I panicked.

I started screaming for Olivia and raced back and forth looking for her. I checked the dressing rooms. There was nowhere else for her to go! It was a dead end! How on earth could she have just disappeared?!?

My mind went everywhere a parent’s mind goes in those moments. Had someone taken her? How had they gotten past me? How could she just disappear?

As I frantically searched and called out for Olivia, I heard my friend, “I have her!”

I raced back up the short ramp and saw my friend holding Olivia on the staircase next to the front doors. These stairs were right near where I had been standing watching Olivia. How had Olivia gotten past me? How could I have not seen her run up there?

I tore up the stairs and hugged Olivia, holding her and telling her how she had scared me. I was shaking with relief and disgust over what I had almost let happen.

When I got home and told Phil about what had happened, he immediately thought of the automatic front doors — the doors that opened right into the parking lot. I was nearly physically sick when I thought about it, when I realized how quickly she could have run out those doors and been hit by a car in the dark night.

I had thought I was watching her. I had thought she couldn’t get past me. But somehow I had missed it. I hadn’t been concentrating enough on her, and with her toddler speed, she had slipped past me.

Thank the dear Lord she chose the stairs for her escape, not the front doors. But it was that close. For those few moments, I had no idea where she was. I had let my two year old out of my sight and I nearly lost her forever.

I feel terrible even admitting my mistake. A part of me wants to never tell anyone what I did. But I want to remember so I don’t do it again, so I don’t allow myself to be distracted for even a second when I am watching my children.

It is so true. It only takes a second for tragedy to happen. Tonight, I am thanking God that I got off with a warning and my daughter is safe.

Note: Sorry for the terrible photo quality! I took those shots on my iPhone.

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About Janice

Janice is co-founder of 5 Minutes For Mom. She's been working online since 2003 and is thankful her days are full of social media, writing and photography.

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56 Comments

  1. Stephanie says

    December 8, 2009 at 10:36 pm

    What a frightening moment. Your heart must have been beating a thousand beats a minutes! I am so glad she is safe and sound.

    Thank you for the reminder to be vigilant as I watch my girls. It’s so easy to have those moments when you walk/look away for “just a second.”

    P.S. Her hat is totally cute. I love those bright, rainbow-inspired stripes.

    Reply
  2. debi b says

    December 5, 2009 at 1:48 am

    OMGOSH! How scary!

    Reply
  3. Lindsey says

    December 5, 2009 at 12:33 am

    Oh no, so scary! I’m so glad you shared this because it’ll help me remember how important it is to be a vigilant parent. There’s no such thing as paranoid, especially with a little one!

    Reply
  4. Maggie M says

    December 4, 2009 at 1:11 pm

    Oh, Bless your heart, that must have been terrifying. I know, I’ve done it. Yep, it just takes a few seconds. I’m proud of you for sharing your story with us because it serves as a reminder to everyone that it only takes a few seconds…kids get grabbed (abducted) under far less circumstances, as we’ve all been reading and hearing about in the news. You ARE a great parent. If God wanted you to be PERFECT, He wouldn’t have given you children, LOL Hugs, Maggie

    [email protected]

    Reply
  5. adrian says

    December 4, 2009 at 10:58 am

    powerful story – thanks for the reminder

    Reply
  6. hollowsins says

    December 4, 2009 at 5:37 am

    I am so glad she is ok.As parents we expect ourselves to be perfect and to never make mistakes,but we are not perfect and we have all had a scary moment in our lives.I can only imagine how you felt.but don’t let it make you doubt yourself ..you are simply human.I guess that’s why we have angels to watch over our little ones too.

    Reply
  7. Loretta says

    December 4, 2009 at 12:59 am

    No parent is ever perfect and it’s crazy that we think there are perfect parents even in existence. What we really need is more people to talk about it when things like this happen to us, because this is reality.

    It’s amazing what can happen in those tiny seconds sometimes. Of course, that doesn’t mean we should turn into crazy paranoid parents either, that would just be … well, crazy.

    Reply
  8. Brandy Rucker says

    December 3, 2009 at 7:43 pm

    I never understood the pain associated with that kind of fear until I became a parent.

    Reply
  9. Casual Friday Every Day says

    December 3, 2009 at 7:39 pm

    Oh Janice how frightening! Oh how very very frightening.

    Nell

    Reply
  10. Kristie says

    December 3, 2009 at 5:11 pm

    I am so sorry you had to experience that! I have been through it myself and it is terrifying. I am glad everything turned out ok.

    Reply
  11. LaShaunda says

    December 3, 2009 at 4:43 pm

    I have one of those stories for each of my kids (3) You feel like the worse parent ever. They were just there, how could you lose them?

    I think it’s God’s way of showing us how precious they really are.

    Glad you had a happy ending to share.

    Reply
  12. 2 Toddlers and Me says

    December 3, 2009 at 4:41 pm

    How frightening! I can’t imagine your panic. Thanks goodness it all turned out all right. It is amazing how quick kids can be! So it’s a good message for everyone.

    Reply
  13. Joliene D says

    December 3, 2009 at 3:06 pm

    It can happen to anyone, and I’m so relieved this story had a happy ending – & one with a lesson. Thank you for posting it, every mothers worst nightmare is contained in your post, and thankfully we have a Heavenly Father watching over His precious children. I’m glad your daughter is safe.

    Reply
  14. Carter says

    December 3, 2009 at 3:02 pm

    Thanks for sharing your story. I used to be a counselor for neglected and abused children. The fact that you were so upset with yourself for that moment and your willing to share that story, shows what a wonderful parent you are. You don’t now how often I see “modern parent” who don’t even care about their children. It the fact that you write post like this that make us come here and read. Glad she is ok and touched by your openess.

    Reply
  15. Heather says

    December 3, 2009 at 1:39 pm

    I think this is one of those things that happen to every parent. I lost my 4-year-old son at the zoo last year. He just wandered away when we were getting our coats on! I was lucky too and he was safe and sound. Scary times for sure.

    Reply
  16. katklaw777 says

    December 3, 2009 at 5:28 am

    It has happened to us all……I lost mine in a corn field once.
    The brave part is sharing and reminding everyone not to become complacent. Thanks!

    Reply
  17. kristin says

    December 3, 2009 at 2:23 am

    We all have these “less than perfect moments” I think I gave my mom one or two. It’s a wonderful reminder though, to us all.

    Reply
  18. simone says

    December 3, 2009 at 2:22 am

    It happens to all of us. I had a similar moment in Walgreens the other day. I went to pay, took my eyes off DS for a sec and he went around a circular display. He was just on the other side, but I couldn’t see him & freaked! We can’t be perfect all the time! ((hugs))

    Reply
  19. Janice says

    December 3, 2009 at 1:43 am

    You ALL are so fabulous! THANK YOU for your kind words and support!!!

    Lisa – your comment reminded me to teach my kids about STAYING PUT if they are lost!!! Jackson once got lost in Walmart for over 10-20minutes! It was horrible – they had to lock down the store and everything. And it was all because he kept lookign for me and goign down aisles getting more and more lost!

    THANK YOU!!!!

    Reply
  20. thatgirlblogs says

    December 2, 2009 at 11:24 pm

    I know your heart stopped — we’ve all been there.

    Reply
  21. Susie's Homemade says

    December 2, 2009 at 9:46 pm

    Every mother has had a moment like this. It is literally impossible to watch them every second.

    Reply
  22. Shannon says

    December 2, 2009 at 8:44 pm

    I lost Gabi before too! So very scary! I blogged my experience as well. Might help to hear another experience: http://bit.ly/8J2a8a It took me a long time to get over it. Forgive yourself. You weren’t trying to do anything intentionally and the best of us still aren’t perfect.

    Reply
  23. Sarah Little says

    December 2, 2009 at 8:07 pm

    My heart was racing the entire time I was reading this. I am SO glad that she is safe.

    Thanks for sharing – I am reminded to keep my kids a little closer when we are out at the familiar places.

    Reply
  24. Charissa says

    December 2, 2009 at 7:57 pm

    How scary, I’m glad everthings okay.

    Reply
  25. Mindy says

    December 2, 2009 at 7:22 pm

    We are prob. all nodding our heads while reading this. One day, last week, I thought that my 17 month old was being awfully quiet..when I went down the hall he was standing on TOP of his big brither’s guitar amp and, worse yet, was pressing his entire body against the glass window trying to look outside. We live in a very old home with very awful windows..it could have been very tragic and , like you, I pretty much couldn’t have been more disgusted with myself. I didnt think he could crawl up on that amp, at ALL…assumed too much, I suppose.

    I am so glad that your ending was a happy one too. It truly only does “take one second” to change your life forever.

    Don’t doubt yourself though, we have ALL been there.

    xo Mindy

    Reply
  26. Jennifer, Snapshot says

    December 2, 2009 at 7:14 pm

    Yes, it is so scary.

    Kyle has always been high energy, and one time we were leaving the grocery store, and as I was going through the automatic door pushing the cart to leave, he dashed in front of me and kept running right across the road that ran through the parking lot. It was only 8 feet from the door. If a car had been driving by, especially if they were going too fast, they would have hit him.

    Reply
  27. Petula says

    December 2, 2009 at 5:53 pm

    Janice, honey, don’t beat yourself up. You’re right to share this, to feel bad and to adjust what you do in the future. But it could have – and probably has happened – to a lot of us. In addition to keeping eyes on our children we need to remember to care for ourselves by making sure we’re rested and have had a break so we can keep up with these little people.

    Guardian angels, prayer, God, luck… whatever we believe in; it is good that it is there because a lot of us would be telling an entirely different story. Thank God she is fine and we have all learned an important lesson today. Thanks for sharing with us… I had a chill as well just reading it. Hugs, smooches and love.

    Reply
  28. Tarasview says

    December 2, 2009 at 5:11 pm

    oh Janice, what a horrible experience for you! God was definitely watching out for Olivia. That is the problem with being human parents… we aren’t perfect and CAN’T watch them 100% of the time! Hugs to you!

    Reply
  29. Lisa says

    December 2, 2009 at 5:06 pm

    I’m so glad she’s alright. I know all-too-well how you felt. A very similar thing just happened to us at Disney, of all places, just last week. We had just finished Nemo and were walking through the gift shop. My oldest son (about Jackson’s age) always likes to lead the way, but this time it got him in trouble because he hadn’t noticed we stopped to see the Nemo stuffed animals. He walked out the sliding doors without us following! We noticed a few minutes later and had wondered if he tried to go upstairs to the observation deck or to the bathroom with his sisters. Needless to say, I was panic-ridden for about 30 seconds until I opened the sliding doors to call out to him and there he was, crying, a few feet from the door. I am grateful he followed all the training we’ve given him to “stay put if you’re lost.” Those 30 seconds were some of the scariest I’ve ever experienced in my life.

    *hugs* momma

    Reply
  30. Heather says

    December 2, 2009 at 4:16 pm

    I’m sorry you had this experience. I honestly don’t know any parent that hasn’t had at least one of these experiences with their kiddos.

    The fact of the matter is that we can’t watch our kids every second of every day. That doesn’t mean that we get complacent, but it does mean that we need to trust God to watch over them when we can’t…

    Reply
  31. Amy says

    December 2, 2009 at 3:39 pm

    I am a HUGE believer in guardian angels. Moms simply can’t be right there 100% of the time. Our children are in good hands. 🙂

    Reply
  32. Stephaine says

    December 2, 2009 at 3:20 pm

    That’s so scary…but I’m so glad she is okay!

    Reply
  33. Diana says

    December 2, 2009 at 2:28 pm

    I’m so glad she’s okay, Janice. But don’t beat yourself up, okay? We Moms are human, after all. We can’t protect their every movement. We will never see their every fall. We do what we can do when we can do it. You’re a good mom. You were a good mom that night at Jackson’s practice.

    If you ever doubt that email me. I’ll be happy to share my stories of floundering as a parent to put it all in perspective.

    Angela’s story about her son swallowing a penny? My youngest swallowed a penny and I wasn’t even around to see it. She told me afterward. And? She had to have surgery. The darn thing was stuck in her esophagus.

    Reply
  34. Cheryl Martinson says

    December 2, 2009 at 2:13 pm

    I’m sorry you had to experience such fear. I too have just had a similar experience last month and the sheer panic that I felt was more intense than I could bare. I was at a cash register at a store I worked at and it was not busy at all. There was a little kids activity center set up where kids could play (right beside the automatic doors, but still in my view). Well, as I was putting in my PIN in the debit machine, my 3 year old daughter decided to play hide and go seek and didn’t inform me that we were going to start playing. She hid underneath a bed a few feet away. It literally happened within a few seconds and I didn’t know if whe went out the doors or in the store. Found her thank goodness. It was probably the scariest moment in my whole entire life and it is making me cringe just thinking of it. I consider myself to be a responsible and loving parent, but it happened just that fast. You’d be amazed at how many parents I know that this has happened to. Sometimes these scary moments will prepare us for ensuring their safety for the remainder of their lives. I assure you, you are not alone and none of us would judge you for this mistake. The majority have experienced the same thing. Thank you for sharing this story with us.

    Reply
  35. Diana Rambles says

    December 2, 2009 at 2:03 pm

    OMG…I am so glad she was OK. BTDT!

    Reply
  36. ali says

    December 2, 2009 at 1:28 pm

    Been there–and you’re so right about it being terrifying! But it does happen to the best of us!

    Reply
  37. angie says

    December 2, 2009 at 1:27 pm

    what a scarey moment for you all while she was just walking and exploring the panic inside of you must have been terrible. My mother turned her back on my sister one time and my sister took off on her trike they looked and looked no real telling where she went but she got away and was brought home by a nice woman. So this happens to even the best of people and yes it is a very scarey situation

    Reply
  38. Amy says

    December 2, 2009 at 1:27 pm

    We had a similiar experience happen last year at Petsmart when I was picking up our beast of a dog from the groomer. Jackson was playing peek a boo around the aisles and then he was just gone. I saw out of the corner of my eye the automatic doors open, but no adult walked through. I just knew that he had gone into the dark parking lot and I panicked like a mad woman. I tore off running to the doors and then I heard him behind me laughing. He was there all the time.

    I’ll never get that moment out of my heard, so I know exactly how you felt. It has to be one of the worst feelings in the world.

    Reply
  39. Just Playin' says

    December 2, 2009 at 1:23 pm

    You can’t get through parenting without a time or two like that. Thank God it turned it good! Don’t relive the moment, just be thankful. Gives us a lot of empathy and compassion for others when we have an experience like this.

    Reply
  40. Marj M. says

    December 2, 2009 at 1:22 pm

    Praise the Lord she is with you now. God has plans for her.
    It can happen to anyone, we are not perfect. I know for a fact you will be on your toes in all instances’ from now on.
    You are a wonderful person for sharing what just may help someone else. You are a good mom too.
    Marj M.

    Reply
  41. Musings from Me says

    December 2, 2009 at 1:17 pm

    So scary for you. Don’t beat yourself up. You were watching her the best you could. If a kid wants to explore, they will always do so in the microsecond that you are thinking of something else. Take a breath. You are a good Mom!

    Reply
  42. Naomi says

    December 2, 2009 at 1:12 pm

    Your heart skips a beat, doesn’t it? Jasper managed to backtrack to the elevator and push the down button when I was trying to put stuff down in the hotel room last week. I was terrified but thankfully he was there when I went one floor down. I was so glad it happened in a fairly empty hotel in West Virginia rather than a busier place… can you imagine if we were in a big city? Ugh.

    Reply
  43. Run DMT says

    December 2, 2009 at 1:06 pm

    It happens to every parent and nothing to beat yourself up for either. We’ve all had that panic moment and thankfully, the little one comes back around with a smile and not a care in the world even though your heart was pounding.

    Hug her tight tonight and have yourself a stiff drink. 😉

    Reply
  44. Deb - Mom of 3 Girls says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:59 pm

    Oh Janice – I know that scary moment when you have no idea where your child is… Becca did that to me at the store just a few weeks ago, which is why she now rides in the cart again when we go grocery shopping, even though she hates it. They are just so quick and it just takes a second for them to get out of your sight. I think every parent has had this happen at one point or another though – I’m so glad that she was found safe and sound!

    Reply
  45. Mikki says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:54 pm

    Oh sweet Janice.
    I’m so happy your dear daughter is safe in your arms. I think all of us moms have had moments like this. I know how scary it is.
    Remember that when your not watching – God always is. 🙂
    Don’t beat yourself up over it. We are only human.

    Reply
  46. Cascia says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:50 pm

    I bet that was scary! I put my toddlers on a harness and leash when I am out with them in a busy place like that. You never know, it only takes a second and your kid can disappear. I’m so glad that she was found safe.

    Reply
  47. Stefany says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:48 pm

    Oh Jan. I am so sorry this happened. I am so thankful that she is okay and know that you are not alone in these things. It happens to every parent at some point. I believe it is God’s way of telling us to “wake up and protect what I have given you.” Even God knows we need reminders. 🙂

    Reply
  48. Carrie says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:39 pm

    How scary! I’m so glad she’s okay. Hugs to you.

    Reply
  49. Michelle Pendergrass says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:37 pm

    How terrifying!

    I know how it feels. When Zane was little, we were swimming at the lake on the boat ramp. Phil had him and I was trying to catch some minnows with a little net for Zane. I chased a few minnows and turned around to see Zane bobbing face down. I didn’t know until then that I could walk ON water. Seriously. I was to Zane lighting fast.

    Phil was shocked because it hadn’t been more than 3 seconds, but I was a freak-nut. I held that boy and cried all day. Literally. ALL day. I could not function. And talking about it brings it back and makes my heart hurt again.

    Reply
  50. Janice says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:31 pm

    THANK YOU ladies!!! 🙂

    Yes, Angela – you are so right! When we share, we learn from each others’ mistakes and hopefully help keep others from making the same mistakes.

    Reply
  51. Shaun says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:31 pm

    I think all parents have one or two of those moments. Don’t beat yourself up! We had a similar one in a department store. Only it was my husband that took his eyes off of her. He had walked away from whatever they were looking at and just assumed she had followed. I freaked out. Screaming her name hysterically in tears. She has wandered away from where he had left her. She just wanted to look at something else and didn’t realize that Daddy wasn’t behind her. Like you, all the terrible things that could have happened were flooding my mind. I made sure that Daddy understood that he could NEVER walk away from her!
    You are a fantastic Mom and I’m glad you shared this story. 🙂

    Reply
  52. Ali says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:27 pm

    HUGS to you…it takes a lot of courage to write about the mistakes of motherhood…and we all have them, trust me! So happy that she is safe, and that it simply turned out to be a “what if..” moment, rather than something worse.

    Your story provides a reminder to the rest of us, to keep our eyes and ears open at all times, around toddlers, not just our own!

    Reply
  53. monica says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:24 pm

    I’m glad she’s ok! But that is so scary!

    Monica

    Reply
  54. Tina says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:19 pm

    Aren’t you glad for guardian angels? Even the best parents aren’t perfect. Don’t beast yourself up, Janice, but thank you for sharing and reminding us all of this danger. My kids are too old to worry about that anymmore, but I still have little nieces and nephews.

    Reply
  55. Angela England says

    December 2, 2009 at 12:12 pm

    Sometimes I think it’s only the grace of God that gets any of us to our 18th birthday. I had a similar scary moment where my crawling-vaccuum-cleaner found a penny. I saw him pick it up and by the time I’d run across the room he was choking on it. So close. Thankfully I’d had multiple first-responder/first-aid courses and knew what to do and had the penny out before he’d even missed a single breath. But it was scary. Scary fast.

    I’m glad you shared. I think almost every parent has had a scary moment like this. A heart-stopping-what-happened-how-could-this-be-me moment. Only through discussing do we become aware of other dangers….like the shopping cart expose that @typeamom did awhile ago. I’ve forwarded that link on to so many other moms who always say “I had no idea” or “I didn’t realize”

    If we don’t share – we won’t realize!

    Angela <

    Reply

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