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Well – at least for tonight.
I have got a lump in my breast, two polyps on my cervix and I am officially refusing to worry.
Today I went for my prenatal checkup and discovered those little nuggets of fun! So slate me in for another ultrasound and an appointment with a gynecologist. (Here in Canada most of us only see GPs for our prenatal care.) Good grief – I am going to be on a first name basis with the hospital staff soon!
Since I am still counting down the hours till my ultrasound on Friday to check in on my baby, my plate is full enough of worry. So when my doctor served up the wonderful news about the lump and the polyps, I decided I was too tired to give it too much thought.
I have been worrying for weeks about my baby – and I am exhausted. It gets me no where – just keep me awake at night.
“Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” Matthew 6:27
So while Susan instantly goes into “You have cancer!” mode when I mention the word lump, (poor thing – she isn’t exactly an optimist!) I am refusing to give in to my fears. It is just a lump – right? I am only 33 – right? And – while I fervently pray all is ok – really there is nothing worrying will accomplish.
And frankly tonight I am just too tired to worry anyway.
Update: I was able to extend my ultrasound appointment for tomorrow to include both my baby and my breast. I will definitely let you know how it all goes. Thank you all so much for encouragement. It was so great to get up this morning and read all your wonderful comments! I am so blessed to have you in my corner!
Due to our site crashing – I have lost all 30 of your beautiful comments!!! Fortunately I had just finished reading them all – so I don’t think I missed any. I am so sorry!
dawn says
I had numerous breast lumps in my 30s – all just fibrocystic junk – had them all aspirated, haven’t had any for quite awhile. I hope and pray this is nothing more. Keep on keeping on with the positive attitude and leaving it in God’s hands!
Frog Princess says
Soory the word was supposed to be pregnancy not period oops!
Kendra says
I am thinking of you, I pray that everything is fine. I will have my girls include you in their prayers!
Nell T. says
Janice, keep you faith in God…like I know you will. I have you in my prayers. Please keep us posted and keep positive. My mother had a lump and it turned out to be nothing…I am praying the same for you.
Frog Princess says
During my last period both of my breast started to bleed. Talk about scary. The specialist i went to see told me it was common for lumps and bleeding during pregnancy due to hormone surge. I understand the worrying and I cried almost the whole way to the clinic where I was to be checked out, Keep smiling and keep trusting God has you in his hand’s.
Amanda says
I know how both Susan and you feel… As a twin, it’s easier to be calmer about your problems but when it come to your twin, you feel all panicky. I am praying for you guys.
Striving says
Hi this is my first comment on your site. I found a lump myself, waiting until 4-02 for my doc., So I can certainly understand how you feel. I have only told my husband and sisters. But I will pray for you and the baby. I am sure God has you safely in his hands. Reading all these comments has helped me feel a little better, I hope it has done the same for you. I will keep you in my prayers.
Two Sisters says
We’re praying for you, Janice!
Robin (PENSIEVE) says
Hey Janaroo,
Just wanted you to know I’m praying for you even as I write, realizing your appointment is today (right?). I was thinking the Matthew scripture as I began reading, and then smiled when you cited it. Believe it, friend, cling to it. This morning I’ve had the benefit of reading your Friday post about Jackson, and I just want to encourage you–all the things in your life, his little life, your family’s life, everything that touches y’all, is working for your good, God’s glory, and somehow, some way, the advance of the gospel (Romans 8:28).
It sometimes amuses me, sometimes infuriates me how God will use ANY means to draw us to Himself; sometimes those means are frightening (i.e., our health, or the health of ones we love). The older I get (and I’m 10 years older than you 🙂 ), the more I realize that God IS a jealous God, He isn’t interested in a divided heart. He wants us to love Him most, to care about the things He cares about most. He knows the heart of man and He knows how to get our attention. Maybe He just wants to remind you He loves you, your babies! your family, and He’s giving you reason to cling to Him, remember Him, to understand that it’s not upon your strength you can rely.
I’m praying for you to have the wisdom to understand God’s purposes during these sometimes difficult circumstances, that your focus would remain squarely on Him (not your circumstances or even the desperation of Jackson), for you to have the peace and assurance divinely gifted by God…and yes, even the man-centered prayers for your health and the health of Baby 5-minutes :).
Peace, cyber-friend of mine :).
Carrie says
Janice have you been drinking loads of caffeine lately? Lots of caffeine can make breasts fibrous, making them feel like there are lumps when there really aren’t. (I cut out the caffeine a year ago and my breasts got much softer and non-lumpy! TMI? lol)
I’m hoping that’s all it is with your breast. Otherwise, like the other ladies said… keep your chin up hon. “Lump” doesn’t automatically mean “cancer”… sometimes an extra blob of cells is just an extra blob of cells. Take them off, move on. 🙂
Janice (5 Minutes for Mom) says
THANK YOU so very much!!!! I appreciate each prayer so much – you will never know!!!!
alida... aka blackpurl says
I am praying for you and I do admire your decision not to worry! I don’t know if I could be as resolute… may God continue to give you peace.
Jessica says
Dear Jesus,
I pray you would bring Janice peace and divine health. I ask you to remove lumps and polyps in Jesus’ name. AMEN
I hope you do not mind the prayer. I always find it is better pray when presented with a need than wait.
I hope you find peace and many blessings in the days to come.
MommaBlogger says
I hope all goes well. Waiting can be so scary in those situations. God will take care of you and your little one 🙂
Sallie says
Janice —
I’m praying for you… keep us posted!
Shash says
Keep the Word in front of you at all times, it’s an amazing bit of hope, peace, strength and many more goodies!! Cast your cares upon the Lord for He cares for you! 🙂
Lauren says
Praying for you! I had a lump a couple of years ago. the ultraound showedit was a polycystic lump, not cancerous. I also had a melanoma on my wrist 4 years ago, at age 26. Praying for you to have peace through the waiting process, and also praying that the answers you get will calm your fears.
Jen says
I am such a worry wart and it really causes more stress than anything.. so you are definitely keeping a wonderful mind by not worrying. Hun you will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers and I am throwing good positive vibes your way for you and the baby. Please keep us posted (((HUGS))).
Brandie says
Janice, sending lots of good thoughts and prayers your way right now.
I hope that tonight you can get some peaceful sleep and a break from this worry you have about the baby and everything else.
jen says
I reacted just like Susan did to start with.
Praying heaps
YoungMommy says
You can add me to the several others who are lifting you up in prayers!! Keep your eyes on Jesus and He will give you a peace that is beyond understanding! Love to you!
melody says
{{{HUGS}}} and prayers from me.
Barb says
Thankfully they’re seeing you right away so if you ARE stressing out, it won’t be for long. A lump isn’t always bad news, Janice. I know this. I had a lump. Had it removed and that’s all it was. A benign lump. The polyps are something that are easily removed. Those are usually fine if they’re removed right away, too.
Can’t wait to hear the results of the ultrasound. I’m not going to tell you not to worry because I know you can’t help it. Lots of people are praying for you, though, including me.
Jeanette says
I hope that everything goes well for you at the doctors Janice. I will be thinking of you and will send up a prayer for you too. Do try not to worry as hard as that is.
Judi says
Do not worry. It never does any good. God is going to pull you and the baby through with flying colors I just know it. Just continue to put 100% faith and trust in Him. I am still praying for you. You are a dear. (((BIG HUGS)))
Jean-Luc Picard says
I hope everything is alright, Janice; keep worry well away from your thoughts.
Kimberley says
Janice,
I will remember you in my prayers. your attitude is outstanding and God is in control. I am concerned though and am glad you will be able to have both the breast and baby looked at. To be completely honest, I have had several friends who have had lumps and were terrified and every time they ended up being non-cancerous growths that had to be removed. I think it’s going to be just fine.
~Big Hug~ Kimberley
Mary (Mert) says
I hope everything is well with you! i’ll pray for you and sis too. 😀
ChupieandJsmama says
I’ll just come back to say that I’m praying for you Janice. Try not to worry (hugs).
Janice says
Thanks Amanda! I will definitely read that passage!
If you are all stunned about where your comments disappeared to – please note that our site crashed and all your beautiful comments were lost in cyber space! I am soooo sad!!! 🙁
amanda says
oops. I double posted with an update…I meant Psalm 91!
amanda says
You are absolutely right to keep worry away. Here’s some more TRUTH to wash your mind with: Psalm 91. God keeps his promises! I’m praying your u/s will bring GOOD results!
amanda says
You are absolutely right to keep worry away. Here’s some more TRUTH to wash your mind with: Psalm 119. God keeps his promises! I’m praying your u/s will bring GOOD results!