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Black Mood Friday
Posted By Jessica
“Why is everyone hungry for more? ‘More, more,’ they say. ‘More, more.’ I have God’s more-than-enough, more joy in one ordinary day than they get in all their shopping sprees. At day’s end I’m ready for sound sleep, for you, God, have put my life back together” (Psalm 4:6-8, The Message).
I’d like to thank the two people who are reading Faith Lifts today. The rest of you are, I am sure, out shopping with Starbucks in one hand and your Christmas list in the other. I am home in my pajamas, staring glumly at the mounds of laundry that are calling my name.
Better to do laundry, I am telling myself, then to be at Target. Just. Stay. Home. I am telling myself. The problem is, I really want to be out shopping. Oh! To be among the excited throng as we push past each other trying to get the last Nintendo Wii or Dora the Explorer Talking Backpack. To throw things wildly in the cart as the pile of gifts gets larger and the amount I am about the charge on my Target Visa gets higher!
This is a problem. Every Christmas my husband and I sit down and make a reasonable Christmas budget. And every year I go over that budget. Although I start out with good intentions, I end up feeling slightly guilty as I buy my children their presents. “No… not quite enough yet,” I think, as I slide a few more things in the bottom part of the cart. “Just a few more things for their little stockings. I can’t wait to see their faces on Christmas morning!”
And my children are excited. Sort of. To be honest, one year I got them so many presents that they didn’t even finish opening them. They were so overwhelmed with the number of toys that they sat stunned in the middle of torn paper and ripped bows without the energy to open the last few gifts.
Obviously, the true meaning of Christmas.
I am tired of feeling guilty when I fail and overspend each year. (And really, the guilt isn’t helping me do any better - the next year I end up spending more.) I want Jesus to come in and radically change my perspective. Not just in how I view toys and shopping, but in how I view my children.
Instead of buying them toy after toy to show my love for them (as well as to try to make up for all the inadequacies I feel as a mom), I am asking the Lord to help me to show them my affection differently. I want God to help me learn that I really don’t need to buy their love. Ever. I That a few modest gifts as part of a bigger celebration about the birth of the Saviour is really the thing that will impact their little hearts.
I know it is a process. But I know that if I can be honest with Jesus and surrender this struggle to Him that He can come and breathe His life and His change into this broken area - just like He does in everything else.
Lord, I ask for your perspective about gifts this Christmas season. Please show me how to live a life in front of my children that reflects you, the ultimate Gift. I love you. Amen.
Nov 23rd, 2007
hi. i’m at home today too, and since it’s a little quieter than normal (with a couple of the kids out for the day), i have time for some self-reflection too. it can be a real buzz-kill.
i just wanted to say thanks for your post today. (smacking the forehead) i needed that!
Surely I’m not person #2 reading this. I always appreciate your blunt honesty. It’s so refreshing. Anyway, this is how I was shown love growing up. It is something I fight too. I’m working with you (and HIm) to keep it all in perspective.
I’ll be number three reading today, however I got my shopping done. :O) We got up at 3:25 this morning, but we only got a few things for our own kids. The rest was for the needy children in our town. Every year we meet the Fire Inspector at Starbucks and break from there to Wal-mart where we brave the crowd to get the most for our money. Individuals in our community invest their funds in this program and we get the honor of spending it on special children. At these prices we are able to ‘adopt’ more children than if we had shopped on another non sale day.
The remainder of our own Christmas budget will be spent making memories with their grandparents. Memories are far more important than a toy that could break in less than a month.
Thanks Jessica!!!
Great devotion!!! My day was spent with a sick 2 year old and we did get out but it was to go to the Dr. I did have the thought that it would be nice to be out in all the craziness. But being a mom is the greatest and since Dad was at work the only place for me to be was at home with Kaleb. We too start with an envelope of money to buy gifts but that is quickly gone and we still have more people to buy for. The Lord gave us the ultimate gift and He will help us to see the light through all the craziness!!! Have a great night!!
This is a reflection of how I’ve been feeling as well. It seems everyone I talk to is trying to cut back this year. I think for the first time I’ve actually prayed about what gifts I should give. And the Lord has showed me some really awesome gifts to give. Why I didn’t think of this before? Who knows? Thanks for a great post! Carol
I want to give my family a nice Christmas, too, but over the past couple of years I’ve turned into Scrooge! I don’t want to buy ANY gifts. Christmas has become just another fluffy excuse to be greedy and materialistic. Satan is succeeding in sucking the joy out of Christmas for us all! I pray that this year I will SOMEHOW be able to have actual Christmas Spirit, THE HOLY SPIRIT, clearly evident all over my house. I want to it feel warm and special, like it did when I was a kid. I don’t want it to be just about the presents….but I’m not sure how. It was part of my prayer this morning that the Lord would reveal a way to accomplish that!
I’ve felt this way for years… that Christmas shopping and gifts tend to get in the way of the real meaning of Christmas… but sometimes I also think maybe I’m a bit of a scrooge… I probably need to find a better balance. I think having some presents for the kids is nice, but for adults, I just don’t get too much.
I thought that I was the only person who bought so many gifts that the children didn’t open them all :0). Mine are older now and the electronic gifts are very very expensive, I struggle just like you in this area and am asking God to change my perspective as well. Thanks so much for being real and sharing your heart.