Shout

“On the last day, the climax of the festival, Jesus stood and shouted to the crowds, ‘Anyone who is thirsty may come to me! Anyone who believes in me may come and drink! For the Scriptures declare, “Rivers of living water will flow from his heart”‘” (John 7:37-38).

I spent my first eight years as a Christian without a prayer life. When I would pray, it was short and frantic…”God, help me read the Bible!”…or “Um, Jesus, I”m sorry I swore again. Please forgive me.” Later, the prayers were more painful and desperate, “God, I need you so much…why aren’t you listening?…” or…”Oh, God, I can’t believe what I did. I’m so sorry. Do you still love me?”

I was thirsty, but I didn’t know how to pray. I did not know HOW to spend time in God’s Presence. I read the Bible occasionally and I was very active in my church…but a deeply fulfilled personal life in Christ? No. Absolutely not.

And then one day I decided to learn how to pray. I made the decision that I would slowly learn how to have a prayer life. I wanted to learn to live in the river of His Presence, instead of standing thirsty on the shore of my weaknesses and desperation.

I asked, and Jesus shouted back to me, “Jess! Come on, girl! I know you’re thirsty. I have what you need.” Sometimes the Lord whispers quietly to my heart, but sometimes He shouts.

Come! Drink!

And even though Jesus responded to me in that moment, it has taken me a long time to develop something I would be willing to call a “prayer life” - I mean years. To this day, sometimes it is still so tempting to try to live my life without His help. And when I do it on my own - it’s hard, it’s exhausting, I destroy everything I touch. But even then He pours out grace: that I can see the death and pain and run back to Him. I return, and He is there to refresh, to fill, to speak words of life, to satisfy, to comfort, to lavish me with His love.

He longs for us - and He is shouting.

Lord, I pray according to Ephesians 1 that you would give us spiritual wisdom and insight so that we can grow in our knowledge of You, that our hearts would be flooded with light so that we can understand the confident hope You have given us… I pray, Holy Spirit, that you will fill us all with a new hunger and desire to be in your Presence. I love you. Amen!