Making Time Together Count

This summer has just flown by and both my husband and I worked 60 plus hour weeks at our camp/retreat center. Needless to say we did not spend much time together. I have missed him and lately I can see a lot of signs where he has missed me. It is a very nice feeling to know someone you love has missed you.

Yes, we did see each other while working, a lot in fact but that is not and I repeat not, spending real time alone together. We were so tired when we got home that we would just zombie out in front of the TV or computer or just fall asleep. We rarely ate a meal together. Our son was also a bit neglected I am ashamed to admit.

This past month I having been thinking a lot on how we can spend more time together even when our life is so busy. I was beginning to feel rather harried and desperate.

The first was also the easiest. I did everything in my power to make sure we ate meals together as a couple and if possible as a family. I would call my son and tell him to come eat with us at the camp as we rarely ate at home. It is just a one minute walk from our home to the camp. Even if we just sat, ate and chatted for 30 minutes the time was worth it. I would delay my meal to make sure I would eat with my husband and even if I did not feel like eating, I would be sure and sit with him. Now that we eat meals at home again, I make sure my son doesn’t take off to eat in the family room or by the computer.

When I take trips to town I ask my husband to come along or to “drive me”. When he has to go somewhere I offer to tag along. This gives us plenty of alone time in the car. I do this with my son also.

I never turn the television set on and I make sure to get off the computer when my husband is at home. Several times lately when he is on the computer I will pull a chair beside his and just talk to him. If he is watching TV I snuggle up beside him. I don’t want to miss any time that I can spend with him when life is so busy.

Another thing that I have begun to do is to offer to help him do a project or complete one for him. This frees his time up as he as the camp director often has more to do than I do. Before I began to do this I would find myself frustrated by having to wait for him to complete a task. Sometimes I can’t do what he is doing but when I can, I help out.

I try to make sure things at home are done so we can just come home and relax. This has been very challenging as I am rarely home in the summer so things get left undone more often than I care to admit and when I am home I just want to sit and relax, not do laundry or vacuum but when I found my husband coming home and doing things that I could easily have done, I was shamed into action.

Lastly, I try to make sure I have a joyful spirit. I want to be someone that my husband enjoys being around. Wives are the thermostats of their home. If I am upset or moody it affects the entire household. If I am joyous, it becomes contagious.

So, when life becomes too busy I just remember that, “The joy of the Lord is my strength”. When I give time to the Lord, he gives time back for my family and me.

Kathleen Marie