8 Comments to 'Don’t Cause Your Sister to Stumble'
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Don’t Cause Your Sister to Stumble
Posted By Jennifer
I always feel rather puritanical when I’m reviewing a book on my site, or telling someone about a movie I just saw, because I always feel like I need to call attention to any excessive language or “romantic” scenes or violence. The reason I do this is that I take seriously the admonition not to cause another to stumble.
Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. Do not destroy the work of God for the sake of food. All food is clean, but it is wrong for a man to eat anything that causes someone else to stumble. It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything else that will cause your brother to fall.
Romans 14:19-21
Sometimes I’ll read a book or see a movie based on the recommendation of someone who I thought had similar ideas to mine about what was appropriate, and been surprised. There are several reasons why this could happen. Someone who watches a lot of movies may be desensitized to violence or profanity. Each of us have sensitivities to different subjects, so there may be a subject in a movie or a book that isn’t pure, but doesn’t incite a sinful response in one person, but it does in me, so that viewer/reader thinks, “This is a good story, overall.”
That’s why I avoid talking about some movies or TV shows that I may have decided are okay for me to watch. I’m not hiding what I’m watching, or a being a big hypocrite that only wants to appear holy. There is a question about if it’s not something I’m willing to share, should I be watching it all?
The answer is probably that we would all be better off if we adhered strictly to Philippians 4:8:
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
Good art, in the form of a great novel, TV show, or movie, does inspire me. It does get me thinking (thinking within my Christian worldview, no less). Unfortunately, our world is not pure, so much of what is presented for popular culture is tainted with the complete acceptance of pre-marital sex, drinking and swearing teenagers, and foul-mouthed adults.
I have a personal line that I try not to cross. I know which of these I am most affected by (in a negative way), and I know what to avoid. That line is different for everyone. I also know that if you’ve set a bar and you see others going under that bar, it sometimes leads to a weakening of your own personal standards. I know that I’ve heard Bible study leaders mention a certain TV show which I avoided based on what I thought the content was, and I would think, “Oh, if she watches it, maybe it’s not that bad.” That’s why I sometimes not to choose to talk about it. If I cause someone else to go under the bar that they’ve set, I am causing them to stumble.
Decide for yourself and your family what you avoid and why. Let God guide you in this. Then let others be strengthened by your resolve and your convictions. If you are in doubt that something you mention might cause another to stumble, perhaps you should avoid mentioning or endorsing it.
Have you been affected by another’s choice of entertainment? Can you see ways in which you may be affecting your friends or other weaker believers, such as your children, in what you view or read?
Aug 1st, 2007
I have been surprised by opinions of others that I thought were much more conservative, too, but like you said, I think some people just get so used to it. We surprise a lot of people when we say we don’t watch rated R movies (and lately many PG-13!) But, it’s true that sometimes we can forget the song “oh be careful little eyes what you see” !
Steph
Oh definitely yes. I recently was recommended a book that in my opinion was appalling … and if I had a quarter for how many times I’ve heard it is someone’s FAVORITE book (Christian and non-Christian alike). It’s made me really think hard about what I find acceptable in TV, movies and books. I know my own stumbling areas and try hard to avoid them, but especially in the area of TV and movies, I have tried to set the bar a little higher. Right now, and I’d say 97% of the time, if it’s not something that I’m comfortable watching with my kids in the room, I don’t watch it.
(but that does depend on the book of course!)
Excellent explanation of a touchy topic. Personal convictions are too often divisive, aren’t they? But can a person do? I have caught it from both sides: a snubbing from the hyper-pious, and scoffing ridicule from the more liberal sect.
Oh well, it’s not my job to change their minds.
But I believe in information so that everyone can prayerfully make their own choices, so I, too, tend to be very careful about making recommendations that aren’t truly 100% above the high bar. But that’s not to say that everything I read or hear or watch meets the standard. In fact, if it did, I wouldn’t be able to read whole sections of the Bible!
Again, well worded and thanks for sharing.
Yes, this is can be a tough subject for me, too. Many, many times someone has told me about a “great” movie that I ended up having to turn off partway through because there was so much junk in it. I do appreciate your sensitivity and find myself doing the same thing. In general, we don’t watch a whole lot of movies or TV, but if there is something that I think might even remotely cause someone to stumble, I don’t recommend it to others. And we are hyper-careful about what’s on TV when the kids are around — even innocent shows on Animal Planet can be interspersed with commercials that are just appalling!
Great reminder. I agree that personal freedom should be sacrificed to keep a sister from falling into a pit.
I feel much the same way. It is a big responsibility to review books, movies, and TV shows for others. I had a book that was supposedly Christian fiction that didn’t mention God hardly at all that I was sent to review. Rather than make up something that was not true, I chose to not review it. It was not an inherently bad book, but if I am reviewing Christian fiction, then I think it should have a message in it and not just be fluff with no meaning behind it. Everyone has to work out their own salvation with fear and trembling and I sure don’t want to cause them to fall. Blessings to you!
My husband and I have been together for 23 years–Married for 17 and he has always said and I agree–If you cannot talk about it THEN you shouldn’t be doing it.
Movies are not always exactly like the book. You always need to account for director’s discretion