The Proverbs 31 Woman

Guest Contribution by Dee from All The While…

As women, we are constantly looking for our purpose in life. It seems that no matter what we are doing, we are so critical of ourselves and wonder if we are doing our best. Now – throw the Proverbs 31 Woman into the mix and it gets even more complicated!!! What is her purpose and how does it relate to me? I can’t count the number of times I have asked myself that AND think I have it figured out. Yet from time to time, I still must keep myself in check to make sure I don’t take it all wrong!!

It seems that more often than not, we, as women think she is there to compare ourselves to and to highlight our shortcomings. I don’t think this was God’s intention of putting her into context where He did. He had a much greater purpose, I believe. To remind us that our hearts must first remain with Him, pure and holy and then we can achieve what is our purpose in Him!

“It is hard to find a good wife, because she is worth more than rubies. Her husband trusts her completely. With her he has everything he needs. She does him good and not harm for as long as she lives.” Proverbs 31:10-12 (NLT)

What does this mean? Are we suppose to be this perfect? Is this what our Heavenly Father requires of us? I sure hope not, because if so, then I am doomed!!!! Ultimately, this is the profile of the ‘ideal’ Godly woman. Did you read that word in there? “IDEAL” Other words, my thesaurus say could have been used here are: best, perfect, supreme, ultimate AND my favorite – MODEL. She is a MODEL. A model car is NOT the same as the real thing, just as we most likely won’t ever be the same as the Proverbs 31 Woman.

“She gets up while it is still dark and prepares food for her family and feeds her servant girls. She inspects a field and buys it. With money she earned, she plants a vineyard. She does her work with energy, and her arms are strong. She knows what she makes is good. Her lamp burns late into the night.” Proverbs 31:15-18 (NLT)

Now – this is definitely a passage where I would fail in comparison!!!! Getting up while it is still dark???? Her lamp burns late into the night???? Hardly – I have a hard enough time getting up when I am suppose to AND my husband knows if I don’t get a decent amount of sleep I am FAR from virtuous! That’s just it — we aren’t suppose to compare! It is just a description or sketch of what an ideal woman should be.

I can’t believe this passage was written for us to replicate this woman, but rather for us to strive to be women who work hard in the spirit of love, for our families, in every way! That is, our spiritual life must be maintained as well as our physical and emotional well being – then the rest will fall into place or at least we will be better equipped to handle it when it doesn’t.

“She is strong and respected by the people. She looks forward to the future with joy. She speaks wise words and teaches others to be kind. She watches over her family and never wastes her time. Her children speak well of her. Her husband also praises her.” Proverbs 31:25-28 (NLT)

WOW – to be such a woman! Wouldn’t that be grand?? Strong?? Maybe I am sometimes. Looking to the future with joy? Well – most times. Watching over my family? Yeah, I got that part. Never wasting my time? Ummmmm… Children speak well of me? Husband also praises me? Well – I’d say most days yes. But again, in comparison, I am NOT that great. And again, I say we rest in the reassurance that these are traits we should strive for. Will we achieve them? Some of them, yes – all of them, NO WAY! We aren’t perfect! There was only one person who has ever walked the earth who was perfect and He is the reason we have the opportunity to strive (and fail from time to time) to become more like this woman.

Again, I ask, what is the purpose of the Proverbs 31 Woman? It is for US!! Just as we were given the 10 Commandments, we are offered numerous bits of wisdom and encouragement in Proverbs, the 31st chapter being no exception.

I believe also that her spirit is where we should focus rather than her activities. The spirit, in which she works for her family, helps the needy and not waste her time is one of love for Christ. How do we know? Her beauty shows it – ok, not her physical beauty as it is told (though I must believe she was GORGEOUS) but her inner beauty. To have all of these people respecting her and speaking well of her, she had a pure heart!

I think in finding the purpose of the “Woman” we can look again at the word which titles the book. ‘Proverbs’ other words that can be used in place of proverb are: truth, rule, principle, and my two favorites GUIDELINE & MOTTO. So we have it right there – Proverbs 31 is a guideline for us to follow or a motto for us to claim for ourselves and our lives.

I know that in this season of my life, my purpose is that of the P31 woman. I am also very aware of the fact that I must only use this passage as a guideline for my life and that without prayer and much meditation on the Word, all my efforts are in vain. I encourage you my fellow women, wives, and mothers….to continue praying and meditating on that which can build us to become better at all aspects of our lives. Let us remember to be imitators of her spirit, not comparing our activities!

“Charm can fool you, and beauty can trick you, but a woman who respects the Lord should be praised. Give her the reward she has earned; she should be praised in public for what she has done.” Proverbs 31:30-31

Please, do not compare yourselves when you see women who seem to have P31 all wrapped up, because as good as it looks, we all have faults and areas in which we fail. Rest assured that woman who “seems” to have it all figured out, she struggles sometimes too! Believe me – I have had people tell me that I seemed to have it all together and NOTHING is further from the truth. I simply have a great Counselor who I can talk to ANYTIME and who gives me a great “Road Map for Life” to go along with His services.

by Dee Austin
All The While…